Big Boss

I sat at my desk across from the empty room, working on paperwork as other employees were at their desks behind me. Today I had to bring my toddler to work. He was happily playing in the empty room where I could keep my eye on him.

Engrossed in my work, I took my eyes off the room briefly. Suddenly, to my surprise, the closed door in the room began to open and my toddler was going through it into the next room. Before I could get out of my chair another door opened off that room and a bright light shone out of it. “Oh, no!” I whispered under my breath, as my precious babe started to enter that room as well. “That’s the ‘Big Boss’s’ room!” I gasped. Then I thought to myself, “It'll be okay. He will charm the 'Big Boss' like he does everyone else who meets him.”

Then I woke up. 

Three days later my friend April and I were waiting to watch the online memorial for my son Craig, who died the year before. I told her about the “strange” dream I had. “Marilyn!” she said. “Don’t you know who the ‘Big Boss’ is?” She was excited as we discussed the obvious meaning of my dream. God was reassuring me that my beloved son was being welcomed into His “office”. My eyes tear up now as I tell this story. I’m a believer you know.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Life goes on. It's been a year since the worst experience of my life happened. Grief does terrible things to one's life if you allow it. Personally, it has taken it's toll on my body with various illnesses and complaints. Nothing serious enough to send me in search of the Big Boss's office, but enough to send me spiraling into the depths of self-pity. The more I hung onto my sorrow, the more my body has held onto enough illness to keep me feeling pretty miserable and wanting to isolate myself from well-meaning family and friends. Slowly but surely I am overcoming the worst feelings of despair. I'm beginning to see joyful happenings around me and desiring to participate in some of them.

I am blessed with a wonderful family. All are well and happily progressing in their lives. Grandchildren are working or in college and the youngest grandchild Kelly is still in high school. This weekend there will be a jubilant celebration when the oldest granddaughter Audrey and her husband Erick host a "gender reveal" party at their home. I will finally have my first great-grandchild! Great reason to hang in here, get healthy, and be around for the arrival of the baby next spring! Ahhh.. the Circle of Life.

There are many more tales to tell about our family's history. As I'm the oldest one left, I guess it falls on me to tell them.  Stay tuned.

Peace and good memories,

Marilyn