To Take or Not to Take

Kevin & Michael 

In the past I followed the blog "The Admitted Liberal", written by the son of a good friend of mine from my high school days. His blog dealt with many of today's issues - political and otherwise. He became frustrated or like so many of us, felt like it was a futile effort to continue his commentary as the appalling state of the current administration continued to spiral out of control. He comments on this blog from time to time, and I email him in return. I did not know this last time that he had moved out of the country. His mother informed me, and shortly thereafter Kevin answered my email containing my request. He has already published one book, and is working on another. The following details his most recent move with his husband, Michael to Mazatlan, Mexico. If any of you ever consider moving south of the border, you must read this!

"Northern end of Playa Gaviotas...two blocks from our apartment."

"Marilyn recently asked me three questions.:

1. If I’d finished my book (the same book for which I cited the discontinuance of my blog last spring). 

2. If I was bored, and 

3. If I’d like to submit a piece for her blog.

I hope the following addresses all three. 

"Since last April I have come up with a myriad of reasons not to write in my home in Portland, Oregon; Beer-fest, urban hikes, beer-a-palooza, out-of-town visitors and beer-o-rama, just to name a few. But in addition to self-doubts about the project, the most pressing (and genuine) excuse for ignoring the next great American novel is the decision my husband and I made to move to Mexico. 

"Though the move was not accomplished until this month (January), we had hatched the plan last May. Michael had a full-time job to worry about until just before our departure, leaving me with most of the responsibility for research and planning. The bulk of my efforts involved hours pouring over the Mexican government’s immigration website and scouring blog entries of past and present U.S. ex-patriots, many of which contained conflicting or completely contradictory information. A common detail was, however, that Mexican apartments are typically rented furnished, a fact we validated during a house-hunting trip to Mazatlan in mid-December. 

"So we sold our condominium in Portland and ended up donating almost all of our possessions (a gesture of 'free-cycling' after a moving sale held a week after Christmas failed to produce any buyers), though we didn’t have a lot. Our one-bedroom unit was sparsely furnished primarily with IKEA products and a minimum of other chattel. Once all of the donations had been removed, we were left with five small suitcases and five small moving boxes.

Sometimes people smuggle the darnedest things! 

"The suitcases contained our newly pared-down wardrobe (as FedEx had listed 'used clothing' at the top of their list of things Mexico would not allow to be shipped in), our laptop, all of our important paper documents and a few small keepsakes. Among other things, the contents of the moving boxes included a couple of framed art pieces, some favorite kitchen accessories and containers, some bed and bathroom linens (including an at least 75-year-old quilt from my grandmother and hand-crocheted throw from my mother), a gallon-sized plastic bag of over-the-counter drugs that every household collects over time, a computer printer, two well-seasoned Le Creuset pans, four Baccarat wine flutes and a nearly new Vitamix.

"Michael had suggested several times that we were retaining too many things. He expressed his belief that to be geographically (and emotionally) nimble, we needed to divest ourselves of almost all physical possessions. It wasn’t that I disagreed, but even the Saharan nomads moved various trinkets and accessories required to equip their tents and I had already relinquished three pairs of Cole Haans, so I had insisted on the final inventory. As is often the case, however, the Universe sided with Michael.

"The five moving boxes had been hauled to FedEx the day before we left for Mexico. The boxes each contained a meticulous packing list that included a description of every item (in English and Spanish), their declared value and a declared 'box total' value.  A copy of each list was provided to the FedEx staff members assisting us, who verified the acceptability of the items being shipped before charging us an exorbitant fee for each parcel and indicating that they should be delivered in five days. 

"We boarded a plane to Mexico the next morning and spent much of the next eleven days hostage to erroneous delivery windows offered by FedEx. Three of the boxes had come straight to Mazatlan, but for various reasons the local office could not get them to our new apartment. Two boxes were held for a week in Mexico City by Mexican Customs to determine that 'bed and bathroom linens' were considered 'used clothing', OTC drugs were considered illicit, and the wood in framed art 'had to be tested'. They threatened to refuse entry for the boxes entirely, but we persuaded FedEx employees to remove the 'offending' items so that the remainder could be cleared. When they finally arrived, the residual items had not been properly repacked and consequently many were either damaged or destroyed.

"There was much gnashing of teeth and cursing of both FedEx and the Mexican Customs Office during that period. But I awoke on the twelfth day to find that the sun had still risen, our loved ones were still alive, and that we at least had our laptop (which contained what there is so far of my new book), so I calmed down and committed to resume writing ASAP.  The only hitches so far have been Cerveza-fest, beach outings, Cerveza-palooza, out-of-town visitors and Cerveza-o-rama. Oh Dios mio!"

I couldn't help but laugh at Kevin. I can certainly relate to the disposal of worldly goods. There is no way I could ever part with all my "treasures" to move anywhere. (Except maybe to Heaven?) I suggested that they might have got a lot of help if they had followed the Marie Kondo method of de-cluttering that is so popular on Netflix today. Marie Kondo  However, I told Kevin that although I am able to "thank" all of my treasures and possessions as Marie suggests, I could never throw them away afterwards! 

He replied: "Michael was VERY familiar with Marie. Of course, in my most recent experience, I didn't get to say "thank you" to all my stuff before it was gone." 

Thank you, Kevin, for such an informative essay on such an important move. I hope you continue to think it was worth everything you two went through, and that you enjoy your life in Mexico to the fullest! You must give me an update from time to time. Especially the progress on the new book.

Peace, sunshine, and lots of the best cervesa,

Marilyn

Two for One..

Kelly and her dad Matthew

First, I would like to give a "shout out" to my youngest grandchild, Kelly,

who turned 13 this past November. Kelly is a very unique young lady. She's a straight A student and has been throughout her school years, while also participating in various academic tournaments, such as a national mathematics pentathlon in 2015. She takes dance and cheer leading, loves to draw, and even shows a great interest in music, begging her dad for a flute when she was only nine years old. She valiantly tried to learn to play it from YouTube videos. When she became frustrated with the flute, she decided she needed to learn to play the ukulele! She got a ukulele that Christmas. A couple of months later, she was playing fairly well - again from watching YouTube. She then asked her dad for a special case for the ukulele, which was rather expensive. Dad proposed a challenge. Learn to play a particular song, and he would buy it for her. When Miss Kelly made her debut her cousin Cameron was there and decided to join in on her rendition of "Stairway to Heaven". This was only a couple of months after she received her ukulele for Christmas.

(I have tried several ways to embed this video with no luck. I even tried adding it again. I hope you can watch it now. If not, watch it on YouTube.)

I think they did a good job! Now I hear a rumor that Kelly may next be asking for a guitar. (She got a keyboard!)

This is the young lady who told me that she wanted to be a mechanical engineer when she grows up! Early last year she attended "Girls Day" at the University of Texas. I haven't heard yet if she will attend the next one in February.

Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math (STEM)

https://girlday.utexas.edu/

(Kelly at Science Fair 2018 - W/Astronaut)

She's always on hand to help when her Dad, Matthew, is doing something for Grandmommy that requires a little mechanical skill. My birthday gift this past November was a new blind for the front door. Here's Kelly helping with the installation: (Note the electric screwdriver.)

And last, but certainly not least, we have discovered Kelly has another talent. Kelly was in her middle school UIL One Act Play, "And a Child Shall Lead Them", on December 1st. She won an Honorable Mention award for Solo All Star Cast member. Aunt Carajean went to see her perform. The play was about the Holocaust. Part of her performance was playing a "fake" violin, which she "air-bowed" to violin music. My heart swelled with pride when I heard about this. 

"And a Child Shall Lead Them"

Congratulations, dear granddaughter. I cannot wait to hear what you accomplish next! I see success in your future no matter which direction you choose to go.

*******************************

On another note...

Recently a good friend of mine told me the following true story. I was enthralled with it, and asked him if he would write about it just as he told it to me. He did, and gave me permission to post it here. The one condition was that he remain anonymous.

"About two weeks ago on a very cold day, I came across a shabbily dressed man, one clearly living on the streets, sitting outside my supermarket having lunch consisting of a bag of potato chips, a can of Goya beans being eaten with a spoon, and a bottle of Gatorade. It was emotionally disturbing to see such despair in a human being's attempt to survive. Considering how I might give money to someone in need without offending his dignity, I was in a bit of a quandary. So after passing his table, I returned to his table holding out a $10 bill (all I had with me) saying to him that I had seen this money under his chair and thought it had perhaps fallen out of his pocket. His response was that he had not seen any money under his chair when sitting down. Well, I told him the money was his if he wanted it. He graciously accepted, with heartfelt thanks.

"Fast forward another week, I was standing in line at the supermarket, and there was what appeared to be a poorly dressed young woman of color checking out using store coupons for various items being purchased. By all appearances as well as her accent she may have been of Haitian descent, and I had to curiously wonder at what was an anomaly in a rather upscale supermarket. Only a short moment after stepping away with her purchases, and while I was being checked out, she turned and coming up to me, handed me a $10 bill. I was puzzled about why she was doing this, and she said she wanted to give me $10 toward the purchase of my groceries. I cannot remember when I have ever been so humbled, while thinking it should have been the other way around. 

"Afterwards, I approached her with thanks, and putting my hand on her shoulder, I asked why she had shown such kindness towards me. Much of what she said was indiscernible, when in broken English she explained that her mother and her grandmother, had always taught her to do kind things for others...and I was the one she had chosen. 

"This paranormal moment reminded me as something worthy of Rod Serling's 'The Twilight Zone.'"

My friend happens to be a very kind, cultured and well-educated man. I feel that there could not have been anything in his appearance or manner to indicate to anyone that he was in need. When he first told me this, he seemed completely unaware of the connection between the two events. The ten dollar bill seemed to be the only common denominator. He said his first instinct was to refuse the money from the woman. "Oh no, you would deny her a blessing by doing that," I cautioned, "this was your blessing in return for helping out your fellow man."

"The (spiritual) Law of Reciprocity, also known as the Law of Sowing and Reaping, allows us to receive as a result of what we give or do. Scripture makes it clear we might receive the same thing we give, such as mercy (Mt 5:7)...Typically, we receive to the same degree we give." (Larry Fox) "Genuine giving feeds joyfulness. The more generosity, the greater joy. And we can be more generous than we ever thought possible."— Geri Larkin in The Chocolate Cake Sutra

The law of reciprocity is also used in business and psychology.. and there is even a law of physics in the same vein. I prefer to think it all started with the "spiritual" law.

Knowing what a kind and generous man my friend is, I think he will be seeing more of the Law of Reciprocity popping up in his life.  Next time he won't be so puzzled when it happens.

Sowing love and peace,
Marilyn

BLESSINGS ABOUND

Having been dealing with personal financial "issues" with the government for over a year now, and being mortally depressed by the state of said government under the current administration, I've had to rely on love, understanding, and more than a little support from others. Not wishing to sink to the level of leaving this formidable mess, I've been using many affirmations, pep talks, prayers, and spiritual websites and books to keep me at some level of sanity. After speaking with four different friends in the past week on several different topics and hearing from others via email, I reminded myself this morning to recognize the richness of having so much love in my life. It reminded me of a poem I've had bookmarked in a volume of Leaves of Gold, which was given to me by one of my best friends (now deceased) when I was going through a divorce at the tender age of 20.  

Old Friendship

by Eunice Tietjens

Beautiful and rich is an old friendship,                 

Grateful to the touch as ancient ivory,

Smooth as aged wine, or sheen of tapestry

Where light has lingered, intimate and long.

Full of tears and warm is an old friendship

That asks no longer deeds of gallantry

Or any deed at all -- save that the friend shall be

Alive and breathing somewhere, like a song.

I am blessed with friends not only from my high school years (still breathing like a song), but also newer ones. I treasure the high school friends that I have reconnected with, and friends I made so many years ago -- some as long as 50 years ago, that still correspond with me. When I begin to feel a sadness overtake me, I shake myself, and thank God and the Universe for such an abundance of riches! Even though we may not see each other in person, there is joy in the communications we share.

Ahh, then I am delighted to have a new friend show up in my life from time to time. As I rarely go out anymore except for medical or dental appointments (this will change soon, as my daughter's new residence is less than 5-minutes away), the Universe has taken to moving someone in next door to rattle my thoughts and become a new friend. The latest happens to be a lovely woman around the age of my children. She's from the mid-west, and until recently
she worked from home for the U.S. government. Our latest talks revealed the concerns she has on the government shutdown. She is one of the ones
placed on furlough. Luckily, she is a smart, savvy woman who has a savings account to keep her afloat if the shutdown doesn't go on forever. Not married, and having no children to come to her rescue (as I do) if things got really tough, my own fears seem minuscule in comparison. I am determined to put a damper on my complaints when talking to others

Just a few friends..I need new photos, please!

This self-absorbed reflection on my personal life is something I guess I really needed to do to get out of my blue funk, and to express my gratitude for all the friends and loved ones in my life. Now that it is out of the way, I am going to share the good news that abounds in the lives of my loving family. My grandchildren in particular have had lots of interesting events going on. Many of us got together Christmas for good food, music, fun and laughter. Lots of news since my last posting. It will have to wait until next time.

Love and Peace,

Marilyn