I SEE YOU

Nearly twenty years ago I was working at FEMA in the newly formed teleregistration division that allowed victims of natural disasters to call in and register for disaster assistance. This was formed at the time of the Loma Prieta earthquake in San Francisco in 1989. I had been called back for a new disaster, and I was still taking applications over the telephone. Each of us had our own little cubicle and places to thumbtack information to help us with completing the applications. By this time, I was a student of Unity and a firm believer in positive affirmations. I tacked upon the wall by my telephone a bumper sticker that read “Good Stuff Happens”. There was another version at the time that seemed popular with a lot of folks, but it was the opposite of what my sticker stated.

Disaster assistance employees were considered “temporary” employees. In the beginning of a disaster we needed lots of people on the telephones. I can remember as many as 500 – 600 working at one time. Many of these were quickly released as the number of calls decreased. Consequently, as we were a university town, we hired a lot of college students in need of supplemental income, even if only temporarily.

When I tacked up my “Good Stuff” sticker, I was very quickly inundated with young people who were drawn to it like a magnet. Most of these were young men. I was very moved by their sincerity in asking me questions. A lot of them were in their freshman year, and I represented a mother figure. Maybe they just needed reassurance as they were far from home.

One young man was so handsome he was almost beautiful. Like someone out of a Michelangelo painting. A cherubic face and curly dark hair that fell over one eye. He came with two or three others to talk with me on break, but waited until we were alone to bring up the fact that he was very sad that people did not get to know the real person behind his good looks. He told me how lonely he was most of the time. Even though young women were attracted to him, it was always just a superficial attraction. And for obvious reasons, the guys his age didn’t want to hang out with him. My heart was moved by his story. I don’t remember what I told him, but I’m certain I told him that the right young woman would show up when she was supposed to... and to not give up trying to be a friend to those he dated. I know I told him he was blessed with his good looks – they were a gift. He was modeling to earn money for his college tuition.

The most inquisitive young man was persistent in tracking me down during breaks or slow times when the phones were quiet. He asked me all kinds of questions about my faith, religious affiliation, books I read, etc., etc. I told him at the time I was reading a book about “Findhorn”. This was (and still exists in a much more sophisticated form) a spiritual commune that was started on a northern coast of Scotland in the early 1960s. The book I was reading was concentrating on the beautiful gardens these people were able to grow in the cold, inhospitable climate. Even in the dead of winter, the roses bloomed incredibly large and beautiful. Agriculturists came from all over the world to study their organic methods of gardening. The practices at Findhorn were very unconventional to say the least. I agreed with many who said it was the frequent group meditations that attributed to their success. I also shared with this young man that these first people at Findhorn believed that plants had spirits or Devas who helped them grow, and that these spirits communicated to the people the methods to use to make them thrive! (Not that I agreed with this.) This led to a discussion about other beliefs. He wanted to know if I believed that God was in everything. I told him I did...that God was omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent. The next day he came to me and teased me, saying that he did some research and that my beliefs amounted to “pantheism”... I said, “No, no”. And we talked more about the presence of God, as I observed it. The life force in all living things. (A rock did not qualify as “living” in my eyes!) And all living things need to be treated with reverence.

I don’t remember when the young man left FEMA, so many came and went. It was months later, perhaps even a year, that I received a telephone call late one night. The connection was poor and it was obviously long distance. It was my young friend. He called to tell me how much our conversations meant to him. I asked him where he was. He told me he had dropped out of UNT. When I expressed my dismay, he informed me that he was now attending Duke University. Surprised, I asked why he switched. He told me he decided to take a different path with his life, and that he now was majoring in theology. I guess he needed to clarify in his own heart what he believed.

I have often wondered about this very special young man. I wish I could recall his name. Maybe someday I will recognize him on a book cover, or hear of him in a pulpit somewhere. Wherever he is, I know he is making a difference in the world!

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Today I read an article on my internet news site that struck me as very powerful in a low-key way. The author of the article was Terry Tillman. He told of being on a safari in northern Africa about 20 years ago. Everywhere he went he noticed the indigenous people greeting each other in the same way. They would look closely into one another’s eyes. One would say something, and then the other would speak. Terry said he asked his guide what they were saying. It was a Samburu greeting that went like this:

“I see you,” said one. “I am here,” said the other. It was an act of “coming together – of connecting at a heartfelt level.” Or, as Terry felt, “Until you see me, I do not exist. When you see me, you bring me into existence.” It is a way of being in the present moment with another person. It says that they really matter.

How powerful that is! And how I wish that sometime or other, if one of my grandchildren is in need of being recognized for who he/she is, someone will take the time to say to them, “I see you.” And he will answer, “I am here.”

Until next time...

I see you

surrounded with peace and love,

Marilyn

FOLLOW-UP TO DIET OR DIE (and MORE)

I was surprised at the reaction of a few of you to my last blog post. I think the subject of food is tricky in this country. I started off thinking I was writing a humorous piece, however, it ended up pretty damning of the food industry. Or at least what the media has convinced some of us is going on in the industry. I got some good advice and decided to write a little more on the subject.

One friend, Mary, (see her comment on the last blog) reminded me of how I have retreated from my belief in the mind/body connection -- at least where food is concerned. I, too, think that if we believe something strongly enough, our "thinking makes it so"! I also believe that my Creator places the right foods for my consumption, if not in my hand, then in my consciousness. Any woman who has ever been pregnant can vouch for the "cravings" we experienced. Most of the time, cravings indicate a need in our body. (This does not mean the cravings for such addictive elements as sugar, alcohol, caffeine, etc.) The same is true when we aren't pregnant. We just have to be tuned in, and listen to our body's needs.

In my younger years I mostly thought of food in terms of "what can I afford?", and what can I feed my children that corresponds with what the one semester of cooking in Home Economics told me I should. I trusted the food supply completely -- unless my mother told me differently. For years I wouldn't use frozen foods because she told me they were no good! When I reminded her of that when I caught her using them, she laughed at me. Said they weren't very good when they first came out, but that had been years before and they had greatly improved. I'd been missing out on easier and better tasting foods than the canned ones I used, and some cheaper than a lot of the fresh vegetables and fruit.

My diet when I was younger differed greatly from what I eat now. I certainly used more canned goods. I also drank lots of Dr Peppers! The result was a mouth full of cavities. But no weight gain as they say young people suffer from today. However, there were no sugar substitutes until the use of saccharin and then cyclamates in the late 50s and early 60s. And no high fructose corn syrup being used in our drinks as they are today. We mostly ate or drank the "real thing" (in this case, sugar). Maybe that's the problem today. In order to increase profits, so many substitutions that end up being harmful are being used in our food and drinks.

Once we allow certain knowledge into our brains, I don't believe it's possible to unlearn it. We know what we know -- period. However, I can and will cease and desist adding to my already overloaded cache of food additive information! Of course, I still plan to stay away from the additives that I already know are harmful... saturated and trans fats, and especially high fructose corn syrup. If it weren't for the subsidies to farmers growing all that corn, perhaps it wouldn't be such a cheap substitute for sugar. I understand why preservatives are necessary to so many products. Too bad they don't "preserve" our lives as well! And I didn't even touch on the "bad" carbs, or the supposed carcinogens we ingest everyday. Aaaaaagggghhhhh!

When my mother was about my age she had high cholesterol. Rather than put her on medication, her doctor advised her to walk. She bought the first (and last) pair of "sneakers" she ever wore, went to an indoor mall along with other seniors, and walked daily for a month. I don't know how far she walked each time, but it must have been a considerable distance because she brought her cholesterol down by 30 points in one month! So, along with my new (improved) credo of "moderation in everything", I am going to commit to walking at least 10 to 20 minutes daily. When the rain quits, that is. I'll keep you posted.

Food habits have become the new smoking habits for many of us. Kurt Vonnegut (who suffered from depression and attempted suicide at least once in his lifetime) was once asked why he continued to smoke when so many studies pointed out the dangers in doing so. His response was that smoking was the only "socially acceptable form of suicide". Well, that certainly is no longer the truth. Is eating anything and everything we want now the new socially acceptable form? (Or will you go outdoors to ingest that bucket of KFC or double Big Mac?) I hope not. I think it is more a matter of ignorance of the facts of our food supply and its harmful contents that are causing the rampant obesity, diabetes, and heart disease we are seeing in our society today. But too much knowledge can be dangerous as well. Such as my "overload" of info that produces a type of paranoia. One feels like throwing up your hands and giving up! And that can be unhealthy as well.

Enough of that. I began this original blog to be a positive, upbeat, "let's talk about all the good stuff" kind of blog. So now I am going to insert what I have been using as a basic food guide ever since the book Super Foods by Steven Pratt, M.D. and Kathy Matthews was published. SUPER FOODS! Foods we all need to have in our diet. Foods that are not only healthy, but can be a prevention to many illnesses when incorporated into our diet on a regular basis. I highly recommend the book. In alphabetical order, these foods are: Beans, Blueberries, Broccoli, Oats, Oranges, Pumpkin, Salmon, Soy, Spinach, Tea -- green or black, Tomatoes, Turkey, Walnuts, and Yogurt. Since the book was published I have heard of more foods being added to the list. My favorites are Avocado and Mushrooms. With the exception of salmon, I keep most of these in my fridge or pantry. I don't know why I don't do salmon more often, as I really love the taste. I guess I prefer fresh fish (I do buy frozen fillets of tilapia by the bag), and fresh salmon is a little pricey most of the time. Ummm. All this food talk is making me hungry!

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On another note, about a month ago my daughter Carajean and her daughter Ashlyn came for a brief visit. While they were here, son Matthew and his family came over as well. I put Matthew to work on a few little things, like taking down a fire alarm that wouldn't work. He, in turn, put his son Travis to work helping him. To keep from getting a stool, he used Travis to finish taking the screws out of the ceiling:

Pretty nice to have around, huh?

Then there was a rousing game of -- uhhh, something -- with Ashlyn, Aunt Carrie, and his mom. Having played a game or two with Travis in the past, I'm pretty certain he won this game! Kelly and Grandmommy were doing something else at the time. Probably primping!

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Ending on that note, I've got to post this picture of Miss Kelly and the bluebonnets that her daddy took yesterday. What a little doll -- even with the knee out in her jeans! She probably wants to be like the big girls since these shabby jeans are back in style!

I really appreciate feedback on the blog. If you wish to comment, just click on Comments at the end of this entry. Or email me your thoughts as some of you did last time. I will publish them or not, as you wish.

Until next time..

Peace and love,
Marilyn

DIET OR DIE?

When I say "diet", I'm not speaking of a diet to lose weight. Our family is blessed with pretty good genes. As far as I know, there are no really obese members. There are some who think they are too big and go on diets from time to time to lose a few pounds. My late mother and sister both complained mightily about their weight. Looking back at photos of our younger years, I laugh when I remember how "fat" they thought they were, and how healthy and beautiful they really looked. Jean gained quite a bit of weight toward the end of her life, but that was due to all the medications she was taking. Especially the steroids that kept her breathing passages open. I was considered "skinny" by my family. I am now ten pounds heavier than I was twenty years ago, but people laugh if I complain about the weight I've gained.

So.. why the "diet or die" heading? In the 1970s I was told I had high triglycerides and needed to cut out a lot of fat and fried foods in my diet. I did so, according to what we were told was healthy at the time. At a recent physical checkup, I was told I now have high cholesterol levels as well as a high blood sugar count. I am determined to lower both by the next blood test in May. Thus, I've added more research to my ongoing search for a healthy diet. I've already had one heart attack, and do not wish to experience that again. Nor do I wish to go on medications they use to treat high cholesterol or diabetes... both of which could lead to an early death!

I am an inveterate label reader when I shop for food. The trouble is that I don't recognize so many of the ingredients on the labels nowadays. To speed things up, I look for the ingredients we are being told about in the news that are unhealthy for us. That list grows longer and longer, much to my dismay! Watch out for trans-fats, high fructose corn syrup, maltodextrin, artificial sweeteners, gluten, and of course, there is a whole school of thought telling us that refined sugar is killing us all! Stevia sounded safe as a substitute sweetener, however, the FDA considered it unsafe in our foods but safe to sell as a dietary supplement. Now I read that the FDA has approved it since Coca-Cola wants to use it in their products! So, as a person with a sweet tooth, I will now try to substitute stevia or honey in my coffee. Of course, I'm warned to be careful with the honey I buy as well... no processed honey! And did I hear that the honey bee population is down?

I dearly love the flavored nondairy creamers in my coffee. They are now banished from my home in favor of Soy flavored with vanilla. (I am lactose intolerant.) Reading that label, I discover it is sweetened with "evaporated cane syrup".. Back to the internet for more research!

I quit frying foods years ago except for the occasional fried chicken dinner I prepare when one of my children visits or I visit them. It is their favorite from childhood (along with chocolate fudge cake). I grit my teeth and buy old-fashioned Crisco just for that purpose. When I needed oil for anything else, I bought corn oil until we were told corn oil was not acceptable -- I needed to use canola oil or olive oil. Anything else I "fry" is stir fried with olive oil. Until my daughter's last visit, when she told me I should not stir fry with olive oil, as the heat transforms it into a "trans-fat"... (Oh, God, I wonder how I've stayed alive this long!) I'm back to canola oil!

Do you see where I'm going with this? I love my cheeses and yogurt. They're out. Packaged goodies like Rice a Roni, some soups, all baked goods and candies, and ingredients I use in some of my favorite casseroles are all "no-nos" now. What's a girl to do? Ahhhh. Fruits and veggies -- all fresh, of course. Have to be careful about what country they come from. Remember all the e-coli outbreaks from spinach and strawberries. Looking at the glycemic index, I see that I have to be stingy with some of my favorite fruits... too much sugar. And what about all the chemicals used in growing them? The organics are pretty expensive.

I've mentioned that my daughter and her family have all become vegetarians or vegans. They did so on ethical grounds, but have also been encouraged by the health benefits. In the past few days, I've seen on the news that American meats and dairy products are not allowed to be sold in many countries abroad due to the high concentration of antibiotics and hormones! I found one kind of beef available in my local grocery that is guaranteed to be antibiotic and hormone free. It is only for sale in a ground beef form, and costs over $3 a pound. The other alternative, which I haven't tried, is bison! Not a big beef eater to begin with, I am going to have to stick to poultry and fish. I am hoping to find a local poultry farm that produces healthy poultry. In the meantime, I am keeping my head in the sand about all the horrors in the poultry industry. Then there is the heavy metal problem we have with seafood!

I can't even go on a bread (whole wheat, high fiber) and water diet. The statistics on the safety of our water supplies in this country are more horrifying than the food safety statistics. Even bottled water is no longer considered a safe bet. Most of the available bottled water is just filtered water from whatever city in which it is bottled. The list of medicines that are now found in city water supplies, even after treatment, makes one wonder if we ever need to go to a doctor when we're ill. We are probably already imbibing the medication he would prescribe!

I guess you could consider growing your own food. That's if you could find farmland that has not been contaminated by years of over-fertilizing and pesticide use. Or -- and this I am tempted to do -- you could just ignore all the scary information out there and cook and eat anything you like! And die!

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You know I'm only kidding about the last paragraph, but I am so frustrated with all the emphasis on health of late. I don't enjoy eating or drinking any more. I am on an aspirin regimen for my heart, and recently read how even one glass of wine might set off bleeding in my stomach so severe I could bleed to death. And they told us a glass of wine at night is healthy!

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Before I close, I need to correct the date I posted in my last blog. Earth Day is April 22nd this year, not the 25th! I don't know where I came up with that date! Reading this you might agree with me that we all need to take better care of our planet earth and the things that live and grow on it!

The wildflowers are absolutely glorious this year, as you can see in the slideshow above.

Peace and love to you all,
Marilyn

INSPIRATION

It is finally springtime in the Hill Country! Spring always floods me with “inspiration”. In-spiration – I like what Wayne Dyer once said about one meaning of the word. “In spirit”, he said. Seeing the gray, brown countryside green up, and then watching as the colors burst free from their winter hiding places seem to renew my own spirit.

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A recent experience also inspired me. This time I had no doubt as to where the inspiration came from. Saturday night before Easter I had my first labyrinth walk at a local church. The congregation had turned the entire sanctuary into a darkened prayer labyrinth for seekers of any faith to “make a pilgrimage” – a spiritual journey – akin to a walking meditation. An opportunity to commune with God and conduct self-examination. At each Station I was led to a greater realization of where I am in my relationship with my God, my family, and my personal path. I was filled with spirit and a desire to do better as I journey through the rest of my life.

I find it thrilling to note that when I am inspired (“in spirit”), good things seem to happen out of the blue. I have been watching the abundance of weeds and wildflowers grow in my yard, and although I love anything green or blooming, I realized they would have to be mowed again very soon. I am on a limited budget, and I’ve been wondering how I am going to afford to have my yard mowed this year. Last fall I had one estimate of $50, and earlier this year, in desperation, I paid someone $35 to mow and weed eat. Those prices were just too much for me on any kind of regular basis.

I heard mowing sounds this morning and looked out my front door to spot two men mowing my neighbor’s yard. Before long, there was a knock on my door. As I told the gentleman I didn’t think I could afford his price, he said to me, “I’m not looking to get rich from this. I mowed your neighbor’s yard for $25, and I will do yours for that also.” I was amazed, as that was a price I had been saying to myself I could afford from time to time. As he turned to get his lawnmower, he handed me his business card. The name of his company? “Heaven Scent”! I do believe he was!

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The brilliant sunshine and balmy temperatures we have been experiencing are perfect for daydreaming. And daydreams open the way to inspiration. At least they do for me. So many creative pursuits come to my mind. It's no accident this happens during springtime, when nature is full of birthing.

Daydreaming also raises memories of times past -- perhaps of sitting on a riverbank with a cane pole in my hand, not really caring whether or not I catch a fish. Picking armfuls of wildflowers to make garlands or lush bouquets to decorate my kitchen table... Or walking barefoot in a cold stream. The memories and good feelings will stay with me forever. The laziness daydreaming brings on competes mightily with the inspiration I am also feeling! If I were an accomplished artist, I would combine the two and create beautiful pictures of my memories of happy times. Instead, I will make pilgrimages into the surrounding hillsides with my camera, and try to capture memories for a future time.

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The prayer labyrinth left me with a lingering notion of "my path", and where it might be leading me. I will continue to open myself to "inspiration" by way of enjoying our beautiful planet, even if only in my little area of the world, as well as meditation, and of course, daydreaming! I will joyfully share my insights as well as photographs as an offering to the Spirit that is within us all.

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I am sorry I missed the recent "earth hour" event. It was very meaningful to me last year, as I turned off all electrical items in my home and read by kerosene lanterns. Be sure to mark your calendar for the upcoming 40th anniversary of the Earth Day celebration. It is April 25th this year. This website spells out some of the things in which you might wish to participate: http://www.earthday.org/

Until next time, may you all be "inspired" by springtime and the re-birth of nature, and may this Spirit remain in your heart throughout the year.

Peace and love,

Marilyn

CHILDHOOD MEMORIES

Writing about my optimism ~ and where it came from ~ stirred up old memories. When I was asked how I became such an optimist (I've been called Pollyanna many times), my first thought was to say, "It must have been all those MGM musicals and Walt Disney animated features I watched growing up!" I'm serious. Those old musicals always had happy endings. So did the Disney films I grew up with. The good guy always got the girl and everyone lived happily ever after.

My parents often used the movie theaters in San Antonio as a babysitter for me and my sister Jean. Weekends there were always double features, and we would sometimes be on our second go 'round before someone came to pick us up! We especially loved the musicals, and would spend the intermissions in the balcony lounges singing the songs and doing our own versions of the dances. I remember there was a huge table in one area, and we would climb upon it and "tap dance"! (Ours were more of a soft shoe, shuffle, or stumble!) Watching Fred Astaire or Gene Kelly dance with one of their beautiful leading ladies gave us dreams of doing the same someday when we grew up. In the meantime, we had to practice! And practice we did. I begged Mother for some old curtains to make rhumba skirts or flowing gowns, and rounded up any kid in the neighborhood I could coax to come practice with us and be in our neighborhood "show".
The songs were made for singing.. Who can forget Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo from Cinderella? Or Uncle Remus singing Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah in Song of the South? Rodgers and Hammerstein wrote so many wonderful, singable songs for the musicals. I would spend my allowance on song books that were published with all the lyrics of the popular songs of the day.

Ahhhh... the "cowboy" movies! They were a big influence on me as well. Again, the good guys always won the girls, and rounded up the bad guys. Hopalong Cassidy, Gene Autrey, Roy Rogers and Dale Evans, the Lone Ranger and Tonto ~ I loved them all! The Saturday serials could not be missed, and were also great to reenact with neighborhood kids! I loved to hear the rugged cowboys sing.

Even TV in the 50s and 60s had musical variety shows, and there were upbeat situation comedies (without the bathroom, potty mouth humor of today!) like the Dick Van Dyke Show, That Girl, Leave it to Beaver, Ozzie and Harriet, Father Knows Best... I could go on, and I'll bet you could, too.

I think they ought to bring back the big screen musicals. I loved Chicago, Mama Mia, and I think I will enjoy Nine, but it doesn't sound like the kind of happy-go-lucky musical that creates happy, positive people like the old time movies. I would love to see the return of the TV musical variety shows as well. Ed Sullivan, Dean Martin, the hootenannys of the 60s! It was hard to be in a bad mood after viewing these shows.

You can see from this picture, Jean and I never got over our love to entertain, although it took some coaxing to get her to wear the belly dancer costume and dance with me to Little Egypt at one of our big 4th of July parties. We had the most fun while trying on costumes at a local shop, wearing our "granny" glasses and giggling the whole time! Gee, I miss her.

Throughout my childhood, and well into my adulthood, I had two beautiful older women in my life who encouraged me, praised me, and loved me unconditionally. One was a cousin my grandmother's age who shared her religious beliefs with me in the gentlest of manners. She would take all of my spiritual questions seriously, and if she didn't have an answer right away, she would say, "I'll get back to you on that". And she would. Her name was Brooksey, and she took beautiful pictures in and around her home, even setting up a rudimentary darkroom. I got my love of photography from her, as well as her loving outlook on life.

The other was my paternal grandmother that everyone called Mom. I cannot remember a time that either of these kind women were critical of or mean to me. If they were, it must have been in such a constructive way that I didn't even realize it. For as long as she lived, Mom wrote me every single month. Once, when I remarried for the second time, I wrote Mom about my new husband. She wrote back, "Marilyn, I'm sure we'll love Win. You have always shown such good judgment in the past." I saved that letter, and still get a huge laugh every time I think of it. In her eyes, I could do no wrong

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And then I read Norman Vincent Peale's Power of Positive Thinking, and Psycho-cybernetics, written, I believe, by a well-known psychologist of the day. Up until that time, I got most of my information on living and parenting from such magazines as Ladies' Home Journal, Good Housekeeping, and Redbook. A whole new world began to open up for me. It took quite a few years for my shift from Pollyanna and purely innocent beliefs (I am still called an idealist, but I take that as a compliment) to grown-up perspectives on the connection between mind and body and the power of the word, but I was on my way! And I still loved to dance and sing while I was doing it.

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TRYING OUT MY WINGS

I visited the bald eagles' nest again last week, and I was thrilled to find one of the eaglets still there. I watched for over an hour with my camera poised, set on zoom. The most this little darlin' ever did was flap his wings and hop into and out of the empty nest. I don't know if he is able to fly yet, but his wings got a lot of action. As I was leaving, I spoke with a gentleman who had set up two cameras on tripods with long zoom lenses. He said he had been there for over three hours. The adult pair left shortly after he arrived and had not returned. This was unusual for them to be gone that long. The Saturday before, this man watched both adults and the two fledglings being extremely active ~ the adults flying back and forth and the fledglings in and out of the nest. I had an enjoyable hour in spite of the absence of the other eagles, and left promising myself I will be more diligent next year when they return to nest again.

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(March 27, 2016)
EDITOR: I re-read this post for the first time in ages. I wondered at the change in the link I had for the company. Research showed me the company not only went bankrupt, but the CEO Claudio Osorio and CFO Craig Stanley Toll were sentenced to prison for conspiracy and wire fraud. You may read about their convictions here Law 360. I guess I should follow up more closely on some of the events I write about!

I want to write more about the progress of the Haitian relief effort. There have been some exciting developments in the way of affordable housing, designed by noted architect Andres Duany, being manufactured by a Miami-based building manufacturer, InnoVida Holdings who is donating 1,000 of the small homes free. Sadly, another earthquake in Chile and now Turkey are really putting a burden on relief agencies. Even a $5 donation, when multiplied by thousands ~ or millions ~ can become a mountain of supplies. If you cannot do that, then pray. If you cannot do that, then hold a picture in your mind of those beautiful, happy people living in safety, well-fed, and able to get on with their lives. After all, thoughts are energy. And every good thing is made up of energy! So please send some positive energy their way.

I am holding pictures in my mind that show each of my friends and family reading this having a beautiful, prosperous life filled with all the "good stuff"!

Love and peace,
Marilyn

P.S.
After first posting this, I received an email from a dear friend and high school classmate. She wrote so delightfully about her own "movie memories" that I asked her if she minded if I shared it with you all as well. Here it is, and I hope too many haven't already read the blog:

"Oh, Marilyn, how your writing blesses me every single time."

"I can absolutely relate to the movies we saw during those formative and teen years. I was and still am a movie groupie (although there are so few made in the present time that bring this kind of enjoyment). My movie idol was Doris Day. I knew and constantly sang all her hit songs and learned to play them on my piano. Like you, a lot of Saturdays when I was very young, Martha Northington and I would spend a good part of the afternoon in double features at the Texas Theater on the very front row. When we finally would leave our eyes would be so red and strained that we could hardly walk out into the sunlight. On one of those Saturdays we went to Martha's and held a "funny book and lemonade" sale in front of her house. I can't remember whether or not we ever sold any wares, but we had high hopes and enjoyed the endeavor so much. Roy Rogers and Dale Evans and Gene Autry and his wonderful horse were some of the early movies enjoyed on those Saturdays. Also, the Lassie series had us crying our eyes out, and I think there were some heart rending horse movies as well. WOW! What innocent times those were, and how I love those memories.

When Grady and I married I was still in the frame of mind that all you had to do to be eternally happy was to get married and have children and, of course, live happily ever after. It didn't take long before I was disabused that movieland fantasy and learned that life as well as marriage and motherhood takes a lifetime of work and is often filled with disappointments and heartaches, as well as joy and beauty. But when I married at 18, these facts just weren't in evidence. There were no wonderful lifetime classes in high school to introduce us to the household financial, physical and emotional stresses involved in marriage and making a home. Don't misunderstand me, I wouldn't have missed a moment of being married to Grady Curry, but we both would have benefited so much from having had some pre-marital education and parenting skills before embarking on almost 35 years together and having five children all born in the first ten years of that marriage. I've often wished my children had had the benefit of parents who knew how to raise them instead of just growing up with them. Nevertheless, God has been eternally faithful in being present every single day of that time and still is.

Thanks, Marilyn, for the journey down that memory road, reminding me of how much fun I really had and how much I loved those movies all through those years. Like you, I really believe they were what formed my eternal optimism which, by the way, I still have all these years later."

With love,
June

FRIENDSHIP, FAMILY, AND LOVE

I can see it now. My children and grandchildren will probably be rolling their eyes if they have their sound turned up as they read this! No soppy songs for me about the love of friends. My experience is one of joy and enthusiasm when I am with a dear friend or two. This song reminds me of an old movie -- maybe one with Bob Hope and Bing Crosby. Anyway, the only version of it I could find on my music website was this oldie by Kay Kyser. He was even before my time, although I heard him on the radio and maybe in old musicals when I was a little kid.

Joy, enthusiasm, and unconditional love. That's what my little house was full of this past Friday when my former (though she will always still be in my heart) minister at Unity of Denton (now New Hope), and dear friend Pam who so graciously let me live in her spare bedroom at one time. These two delightful beings were on their way to a Women's Retreat, and accepted my invitation to lunch. I had not seen Ellen in quite a few years, although Pam visited me in Ballinger. The time flew by way too quickly as we talked as fast as we could -- and tried to eat lunch as well! I finally put my spoon down, saying I can eat after they are gone... and continued to chatter away.

Someone recently asked me how I managed to be so upbeat and optimistic. I'm going to tell you a little story about how I came to this point in my life.

In 1988, I went through an extremely traumatic separation and subsequent divorce. During about a six month period, I was seeing a counselor, trying to make some sense out of the mess I'd made of my life. My youngest child had just flown the nest, my oldest had just got married, I was going through menopause, IRS tried to seize my property for my ex-husband's back income taxes (which resulted in a 5-year battle), and now another divorce! I didn't think I could bear it.

I really struggled with depression. For the first time in my life, when I looked for employment, I could not find a job. Texas had the highest rate of unemployment in the nation for a year or so during that time. An employment counselor told me that where once she had only ten applicants to send for each job opening, she now had hundreds in line for each job! That shook me to my toes. To survive, I sold most of my treasured antiques that I had collected for years for a new home we had been building. At times, I would go to a local flea market with boxes of my smaller items, and manage to sell enough to pay my electrical bill. (That wouldn't work now at today's electrical rates!) I was seriously considering driving my ancient little Sunbird down to the woods at the end of my property, putting a hose from the exhaust through the window. I did not want to do that to my children or to my aging parents, but I thought there was no other way.

Then, serendipitously, I came across several books at the library that gave me a new look at what was happening in my life, and a possible way to cope. The most important one turned out to be a book by Deepak Chopra, M.D. called Quantum Healing. Among other things, he espoused meditation as a way to get in touch with our spiritual self and perhaps accomplish healing in our life and body. As Chopra is of the Eastern tradition, he recommended Transcendental Meditation (TM). This was best learned through a teacher, who would give one a mantra of their own to assist them. I had heard of this in the past, so I set off to find a TM teacher. I located one in Dallas, and went for a "free" consultation. Turns out this was a very expensive method. They wanted something like $1,500 to teach me and give me my own personal mantra. They even asked me if I had any good jewelry I could give them in lieu of cash! I was devastated. I'm not sure if this is the case of all TM teaching methods but as it turned out, it was to my benefit that it wasn't free.

I was determined that I was going to learn to meditate. I talked at length to my counselor and she was eager to assist me. At one point she told me that there was a church that taught meditation, but she wasn't sure if it were Unity or Unitarian. She checked into it for me and said it must be Unity, as the local Unitarian Church consisted of a lot of UNT professors sitting around discussing how to save the planet from a nuclear holocaust. (A noble cause, but not what I wanted at this time.) We got the Unity address, and that Wednesday night I ventured into a small storefront church.

I had always tried to attend church of differing denominations during my different marriages. After a bad experience with one church when I was divorced with children to take care of, when the church sent me a bill at the end of their fiscal year for the balance that I had not tithed.. well, I was not excited about attending a church again.

I walked into this small "church" and was amazed. There were spiritual books for loan or sale that I had read, as well as a small booklet called "Daily Word" that my grandmother of all people had been subscribing to for me for years. I realized I had been being prepared for this "Unity" experience without my knowledge. I was tingling with excitement as I met Ellen for the first time! When she led us through my first Unity meditation, I knew that I had come home. Ellen, my dear sweet minister friend, (although it would be years before she was actually ordained a Unity minister -- she was a licensed Unity teacher at the time), you never knew that you were the one responsible for perhaps saving my life. I even remember the little metaphysical book you gave a talk on that night -- "Illusions" by Richard Bach. It was a favorite of mine. More proof to me that I was in the right place, at the right time!

The teachings I learned through Unity were always of a positive nature. No guilt or shame attached. And everyone was welcome... one didn't even have to give up their church affiliation somewhere else. We had at least two I knew of who attended both Unity and their original church. There was no creed.. and no condemnation. All was loving and supportive. Unity principles are based on the teachings of Jesus Christ, but do not preclude teachings from other spiritual disciplines. While I attended, we even had a Buddhist monk as a guest speaker. I learned Sufi dancing as well as how to make a Native American dreamcatcher and a talking stick. I participated in World Peace meditations. We had holy communion; once a year we held a bowl burning to rid ourselves of any negative aspects in our lives; and I saw many instances of prayers answered! What we hold in our thoughts we do create in our world! I now try to put all that I learned into practice -- and as a result I feel my world is beautiful. After all, I thought and prayed a lot of it into being! (With a little Divine help, of course!)

You can see that I feel having Pam and Ellen visit even for a short time was like having a blood transfusion! I am re-energized, and making plans for an even more creative and positive future! Thank you, ladies.

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There is absolutely nothing like a Little League baseball game to get the heart racing! Especially when it's a game of 6- and 7-year olds! A lot of these kids are the first in their family to play sports, so their relatives turn out in numbers. I think I cheered as much for them as I did when I was in school. Youngest grandson Travis was a thrill to watch, as he had three hits this game, batting in two runs. (Notice the baseball pants that are supposed to stop at the knees.) I think he was pretty proud of himself, too. Mommy and little sister Kelly played cheerleaders, as Daddy coached from the dugout. The sun was shining beautifully this day, and I was still full of warmth and love from the visit with my friends. It seemed like perfection.

That night we all trooped to the grade school Travis attends, where Amy is a den mother to his Cub Scout troop. I got a couple of good videos of the Award ceremony, as well as some cute photos. Amy makes a great looking scout, and she was especially recognized for all the volunteer work she so generously supplies. (I just had to show how cute you looked in your scout uniform!)

While Amy received recognition and Travis "walked across the bridge" to receive his Wolf badge, I think Daddy deserved an award for letting Kelly wiggle and jiggle and giggle in his lap for nearly two hours!

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I know you all have heard about the earthquake in Chile over the weekend. They were such good neighbors in helping the Haitian victims after the earthquake there. They sent search and rescue teams, as well as supplies, and even set up field hospitals. Now it is their turn to receive help. As of this morning, I could not find a particular organization who will be assisting them other than the United Nations. Many have offered, I'm sure, but so many are stretched thin by the ongoing efforts in Haiti. I would say to continue to send money if you can to the Red Cross, and indicate on your check that it is for Chile. Chile was hesitant to accept help, but finally agreed that they will need some assistance. Not only did they suffer severe damage -- although, fortunately, not as much loss of lives, from the earthquake, but many coastal villages and towns were destroyed by the resulting tsunami.

I've been watching the developments in the efforts to rebuild the Haitian cities. One company has designed, and is donating 1,000 free, a type of prefabricated structure for inexpensive residences that can be expanded upon as needed. These buildings are hurricane and earthquake resistant. What a great company... and what a blessing for the Haitian people. A home that will sleep eight can be constructed for as little as $4,000. They are looking for financing for a massive effort to rebuild there. I will keep you informed.

Continued loving thoughts and prayers will help work the miracles necessary for these people to resume their lives.

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I am planning to make a quick trip in the morning to see if my little fledgling eagles (eaglets) have "fledged"! I missed the last couple of weeks because of the cold, snowy weather we had. I hope they are still hanging around.

I also need to give you an update on my neighboring Great Danes. Piper in particular has had quite a time the past few months. She was punished and imprisoned in her pen by an electrical wire, which made me very sad and feeling responsible.

Until next time, let me hear from some of you. I am always eager to hear your stories as well as mine. And with your permission, I will be thrilled to share them!

Love and peace,
Marilyn

NATURE/NURTURE

About a week ago my friend Jane picked me up to take a little ride on SH 29, out past Buchanan Dam. We were going on that cold, gray morning to try to get a glimpse of the pair of nesting Bald Eagles who recently had been featured in the local newspapers. Jane had seen them several times, as they have been something of a tourist attraction since they first began trekking to Nesting Tree No. 5259 seven years ago. I took my camera and wished for a little sunshine. I didn't get my wish, but I took a few photos anyway. My camera does not have the zoom capability to get close shots, but if you look carefully, you can see the "papa" (my own gut feeling) doing watch duty as "mama" was off hunting for food. The little bumps sticking up out of the nest are the chicks, who were born in December... early due to the warmer weather we had back then.

After watching and talking to other bird watchers on the scene for a good little bit, we decided to get back into the warm car. I had placed my camera in the car when suddenly "look, look, look" -- we all got excited as the female returned to the nest. I could see something long dangling from her beak.. like a snake, but this is the wrong time of year for snakes, isn't it? As she settled into the huge nest, the male suddenly decided to go do a little hunting himself. He swooped over us as he headed toward the other side of the road. It was a wonderful experience. I was enchanted and couldn't stop thinking of them on the way home.

There are an estimated 1,000 Bald Eagles who overwinter in Texas now. Many are around the lakes, and there is even a river tour (the Vanishing River Cruise which travels on the Colorado River and into Lake Buchanan -- closed now due to last year's drought) that draws tourists from all over to glimpse these magnificent birds. I plan to go back to Nesting Tree No. 5259 in the next week or two as the chicks will begin to fledge (don't I sound knowledgeble?) and I would love to see their first attempts at flight.

As my thoughts are still so very full of the plight of the Haitian people, I couldn't help but think of the Bald Eagle as representing the United States, watching over Haiti and assisting her until she gets her wings and can fly on her own. We must not forget..

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My daughter Carajean and her family went to Oaxaca, Mexico the week before Christmas, along with one of Branch's sisters, Estelle and her family. This was an "adventure tour" carried out by the same tour company that planned and took them on their tour of the rainforests in Costa Rica a few years back. The tour included a hike up a 10,000 foot mountain, then bicycling down the mountain, a four hour kayaking trip, as well as lots of sightseeing and nights spent in different villages. Their accommodations left a lot to be desired in some of the locations. Carajean wrote the following:
"On Christmas Eve, we hiked 8 miles in 85 degree heat to a very small, primitive village (can't remember the name). Animals everywhere, dirt floors in all the houses, no windows, everything exposed. Our cabin for the night was concrete, no door to bathroom, so when you sat on the 'throne' you looked out upon your very lucky roomies. That was pure luxury compared to how the locals lived. After our hike, we spent the remainder of the day at the beach fighting the waves, playing volleyball and eating lots of hot sauce, guacamole and chips. This seemed to be a very bohemian style beach with cannibus aromas in the air and young adults setting up their pup tents for the night." The picture at right gives you an idea of their bathroom. When we spoke, Carrie told me of one place they stayed that was infested with big centipedes. You have to really want to have an adventure to put up with that. Branch's sister Estelle didn't sleep that night, I'm told.

They did lots of touristy things like watching woodcarvers and potters, visiting very old churches, ruins, and even a Mezcal distillery, where one of the kiddos decided to try a shot, followed by eating the worm on a slice of lime. Uggghh..

They took many great photographs of their trip, but my favorite ones (besides my grand-children, of course) were the ones they took on Christmas morning. This is what Carrie wrote about that morning:

"Our Christmas present from our guide was a very early morning turtle hatchling release. A local family has been rescuing turtle nests for years on a volunteer basis. They follow the turtle tracks, dig up the eggs (75 per nest), move them to their sanctuary (fenced and covered in palm leaves) and release them when the turtles are ready. The turtles were gray with little wrinkly necks and big black eyes. They would come so close to drifting off to sea only to get swept back to the beach getting their heads stuck in the sand. No wonder only one to two survive per nest. We all felt so privileged to have experienced such a glorious Christmas Morning."

These are the new hatchlings before being released.

And there they go, on their way to sea!
(with a little help from their friends)

I can only imagine the joy of my grandson Tanner during that experience, as he first became interested in "Save the Turtles" when he was seven years old. Big sister Audrey is majoring in environmental law at SMU, and is an animal rights activist as well. This will be in their memories until they are old and gray! What a wonderful family vacation.

How would you like to have an aloe vera plant the size of this one?? (On the left!) The girls are from left to right: Sterling (their cousin), and two of my granddaughters, Ashlyn and Audrey.

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My younger son Matthew knows how to have an adventure without ever leaving the state. He, wife Amy, and Travis and Kelly loaded up the camping gear and dirt bikes during a recent 4-day break from the kids' schools and headed to a campground near Marble Falls. Their friends and neighbors, Chris and Elizabeth and their son Collin joined them. The weather was much, much colder than the original forecast, but like hardy pioneers, they stayed the entire time. I ventured out on Sunday afternoon to join them. I nixed spending the night, though, as it was too cold for these achy bones! Matthew calls this "Camp Easy". Nothing "easy" about living like this, tho! I watched as Elizabeth built a good, hot fire, finding a big rock to place in it on which to cook their "beer butt" chickens. Seems you use a can filled with beer and spices to set in the chicken's tail side, stand them up on a grill and let cook. I don't know how long they had to cook, but I'll bet it was quite some time. Talk about roughing it!
While we women stayed warm by the fire (it was only 32 degrees), the guys were out riding. Chris on his bicycle and Matthew on a dirt bike. There are numerous trails throughout this site. Chris planned to ride a dirt bike the next day.

(Elizabeth at left.)

You can see one of Matt's dirt bikes in the rear of the picture of him and Amy below. She had just been for a ride on a 4-wheeler and had mud on her jacket. Matt was chilled from the ride he just made:
The wise ones in the whole crew were Kelly and Grandmommy. We snuggled in one of the bunks in their camper and read a book while warming our tootsies by the heater:
The boys, Travis and Collin, spent the time while I was there doing what boys do... They were throwing sticks for the Golden Retriever Luna to do what retrievers do, and testing their own strength by breaking (tree) limbs on a big pile of rocks. Collin's Lab, Tucker, was an enthusiastic puppy, while Amy's poodle, Sophie had to be confined to the camper most of the time. Her little white furry body didn't fare well in the muddy woods that trip. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves. Amy and Elizabeth sat by the fire and even knitted when things were calm.

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I want to share a photo of Anat. She and older son Craig have been an "item" for quite some time now. Although I have yet to meet her, I hear such glowing things about her from Craig that I really look forward to meeting her. She is from Israel, but has been here for over 20 years, and has a daughter who attends Texas Tech in Lubbock. As she and Craig both live in the Dallas/Ft Worth area, I don't believe I'll be getting any "nature" photos from them. However, "nurture" seems to fit these two. She is a real beauty (and Craig tells me she has as many or more "knick knacks" than I do!).. They both look very happy, don't they?

Before I close, a gentle reminder to please remember our Haitian neighbors -- either with your prayers or your pocketbooks or both. Efforts to raise more money for them now include Quincy Jones doing a new version of "We Are the World". I can't wait to hear it!

The good stuff in life truly is made up of nature and nurture!
Peace and love,
Marilyn