THE MUELLER HEARINGS (As some of us heard.)

(The second paragraph has been corrected to read "No one can deny that what the report revealed was true.) (There is also an additional response from Dr. Carin Horn.) As I am continuing to receive responses from my readers, I will try to add them directly to the text. The newest is one from Truman Conner. All of the respondents are currently Texas residents unless otherwise noted.. Thanks for your understanding.

Although I downloaded the complete Mueller Report, I have to admit I did not read it. I relied on news reports that detailed the important points as they understood them. Then, my son sent me a remarkable, hour-long video that contained readings by some well-known stars in the entertainment industry. Of course, they had to edit it and only read the highlights, but it is well worth watching even now. The Mueller Report That and all of the news pundits leading up to yesterday's Congressional hearings prepared me for them - I thought. 

Like many others that I've heard from, I was disappointed in the way Robert Mueller came across - a lot of it was due to the accusations of some of the Congressional members, notably the Republicans, and their rapid-fire delivery of the questions in the first session, which made it very difficult for anyone to understand them. Thus, Mueller sometimes stumbled over his answers. I guess I also expected some outrageous discovery that we weren't privy to beforehand. No one can deny that what the report revealed was true. The Republicans spent their time trying to destroy Mueller's reputation and integrity as well as that of others involved in gathering the damning evidence. But they never once gave evidence that the conclusions of the report were untrue.

Once all of the investigations are completed, and we are entitled to view Trump's finances - and their possible entanglement with foreign entities that are holding him hostage - I don't think anyone in the United States can refute the truth that he is the most corrupt, and absolutely the most incompetent president the United States has ever had. He and his administration have done their best to destroy our democracy, and have placed us in a dangerous position in the world. 

I agree with Nancy Pelosi that impeachment is not the answer as long as the Senate is Republican-controlled. The most obvious solution is to vote Trump and the Senators who are supporting him out of office.

The following views were sent to me at my request by some of my long-time friends as well as my son.

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The following is from C. Denson Hill (Denny), a professor of mathematics at Stony Brook University in New York. He has a second home in Poland where he lives when school is not in session. He was the first to converse with me on the hearings via email.

"I watched the whole thing live from Warsaw, and it was very tiring. During the first part, before I became fatigued, I wrote down these names:

Rep. John Ratcliffe, R-TX 4th Dist.

Rep. Louie Gohmert, R-TX 1st Dist.

Rep. Jim Jordan, R-Ohio 4th Dist.

Rep. Matt Gaetz, R-FLorida

Rep. Greg Steube, R-Florida

"Then I got too tired to continue.. To Texas, Ohio and Florida, I would say: It is unbelievable that you could be so stupid as to elect these baboons to represent you!!! Better to choose a random w**** from a house of ill repute, then at least you might find a modicum of honesty, integrity, and someone who does not vastly underestimate average human intelligence."..Denny

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My answer:

"I agree with you. Needless to say, I would like to kick the Reps from Texas in their respective rears. John Ratcliffe in particular was full of hate.. I noticed when he finished his tirade he couldn't get out of the chambers fast enough! He doesn't represent our district, but I'd still like to tell him off. Same is true of Gohmert. However, he graduated from Baylor, so he is probably a good Baptist. This may account for his support of Trump. He probably is an anti-vaxxer, an anti-abortionist, and thinks that if he is wrong and Trump is ousted, he'd love to see Pence in office! In my humble opinion!

"In the first session, I thought Mueller came across as old and confused. He redeemed himself somewhat in the second session. The interviewers in the first were rushing through their questions due to their five-minute time limits. I had a hard time understanding their questions as well.

"I thought the summations at the end were pretty easy for most to understand. Also, there are still ongoing investigations..perhaps/likely more indictments. So much is going on that Mueller was unable to speak of (due to ongoing investigations or classified material) that will possibly help indict the POTUS, hopefully all will come out before the election."..Marilyn

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"I fear that the vast majority of the people in the U.S. do not have the

attention span, or the patience, to glean the damaging info there. Barr and Company have muddied the waters way too much.

"And I also fear that, partly due to the corrosive effect of talk radio, (FOX News), etc., the GOP can still win simply by repeating over and over the words, 'socialist' and 'communist', independent of all other considerations. (To say nothing about Gerrymandering and the electoral college.) Sad.."
..C. Denson Hill

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"My very first impression is that Mueller does not enjoy speaking in public! He also has a very developed vocabulary and it seemed to go over the heads of some. Can y'all not retire Grandpa Gohmert??? Lord he is a nut ball!"...Rita Bauknight (North Carolina)

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"I am very disappointed in Mr. Mueller’s performance yesterday. He did confirm that Trump is the liar we all know, but did not really present any smoking guns after two years (at least that he was willing to talk about). I had put my hopes on much, much more."... June Curry (Oklahoma)

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This next one is from my Number One Son, Craig Young. He wrote this while in a spirited debate on his Facebook site:

"During his testimony today, Vietnam war hero Robert Mueller affirmed

that Cadet Bone Spurs Trump could be prosecuted for crimes (there will be more than just obstruction - there is still a counterintelligence investigation ongoing) once he leaves office. I take comfort in that.

"Mueller made it clear that because of the Office of Legal Counsel (OLC) opinion, he was precluded from indicting a sitting president. The report indicates the Constitution provides the only remedy, which is impeachment by the House and removal by the Senate. Mueller gave overwhelming evidence of 10 instances of obstruction of justice in his report. In fact, those of us outside the Fox News bubble know that almost 1,000 former federal prosecutors (both Republican and Democrat) signed a letter saying that any citizen other than a sitting president would easily be indicted for felonious obstruction.

"The bottom line? The Russians interfered (attacked us) in the 2016 presidential election to aid candidate Trump and harm candidate Clinton. The Trump campaign welcomed their help and even provided them with campaign polling data and battleground state strategies. Trump lied about having business dealings with Russia during the campaign (Trump Tower Moscow). Trump has demonstrated fealty to Vladimir Putin and denigrated our intelligence agencies. The Republican Party is aiding and abetting the most corrupt, dishonest, and incompetent president in the history of this nation."...Craig Young

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"Saw an interesting Internet 'headline' that said something along the lines of Mueller’s hearing was a Republican victory if you didn’t listen to it!!!!! Sure would be nice if we could all put the politics aside and honor each other as Americans.

ADDENDUM:

"My comment about putting politics aside was not intended to disparage anyone about  his/her political passion. I am a Registered Independent, (because it) is not allowed by the State of Texas to vote in a primary election without declaring a political party preference!!!! Some of your readers may not know that. Anyway, I follow world news and global opinions, especially those concerning our current administration. Unfortunately we appear to be a country of nonthinking idiots that lack the willpower to overcome the negativity that prevails and is the signature of the Trump administration.

"I don’t have an answer as to how we can fix our political differences but I know that the 2020 Democratic candidates for President must stop taking Trump’s confrontational bait and build a united policy that promotes our greatest good as individuals and a nation. Without a strong front for positive change and right human relations, Trump will win a second term.".. Dr. Carin Horn 

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"I did not watch the hearings, but instead monitored twitter and then read recaps/opinions in The Times this morning. My (VERY DISAPPOINTED) takeaway from the investigation and the hearings is that they were the product of a stand-up guy who understands that we are in some warped environment where it does not matter if the leader commits crimes."...Kevin Curry (Mexico ex-pat)

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"I watched about 90% of it and I feel like Mr. Mueller was set up as a patsy. All those words in that document! That in itself, was enough to drive someone crazy!

"And, now that they have done all this...what are they going to do?  No matter what one's party that they attach themselves to...what do we know that is going to better an everyday person's life?"
..Mary Smith Hendricks

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"Yes to all of the above regarding Mueller.  The Democratic Judiciary Committee's primary goal was to bring public awareness of Mueller's report to American people who either have not read the report, nor appreciate the gravity of the Trump administration's flagrant violation of the pertinent articles of the U.S. Constitution. Even after this six hours of testimony from Mueller, I think it is highly probable that a large element of non-educated don't have any idea about the consequences of Trump's presidency. Much of our citizenry don't have critical thinking ability, and you have no further to look than Ballinger, typical of today's voting demographics. 

"I don't recall who said, 'You can fool some of the people all of the time; all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time.' (It was Lincoln.) First time in my life I am seeing these words of wisdom questionable as so many of our people, and members of U.S. Senate and House are unwilling to stand up for our democracy. What a sad commentary, isn't it?"..Truman Samuel Conner

(Truman's first response is listed in the "comments" section below.)

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The fallout from yesterday's hearings will continue. The appeal cases to force the witnesses who have been held in contempt for Trump forbidding them to testify, should enlighten us more. Especially his attorney Don McGhan's testimony.

I would still like to hear from more of you regarding your feelings about this subject. Do you believe what's been given to us in the Report so far? Do you agree with the characterization of Trump and his campaign (assisted by the Russians)? Let me know.

Peace,

Marilyn

An excellent review of Mueller's testimony:
Actually, Robert Mueller Was Awesome

TIME MARCHES ON

Today is a special day. It is my youngest child's 50th birthday. Since the following post was written 11 years ago, he's changed a bit. No longer scaring me to death on dirt bikes or scuba diving or bungee jumping, and instead of vacations spent in Big Bend to ride dirt bikes with his friends, he now goes there to golf with his friends. Today he is relaxing in the mountains of Ruidoso, New Mexico with his family - wife Amy, son Travis, and daughter Kelly. I think he plans to play a little golf while there as well.

Matthew is not only a great son, but also a wonderful family man. He allowed me to post the following on my class blog way back when - and he's quite the story teller. Even as a little boy he could spin a yarn.

FRIDAY, JULY 25, 2008

"I don't know why I'm not gray..."

This guy has been my son for 39 years now. I don't know why I am still surprised when he does things that scare me half to death. Bungee jumping, dirt bike riding (photo at left), scuba diving, jet skis... He's always involved in something that should turn my hair gray! He has two children now, and I was beginning to think I could relax. His call from Arizona last week telling me the following "little tale" assures me my days of worrying for his safety are not over.

When he told me about his adventure, I was getting confused. I said, "Why don't you write about it, Matthew?" He hesitated, then told me he already had. Seems he subscribes to a blog for off-road riders, either on motorcycles or four-wheel drive vehicles. He had asked them about good roads to go off road on while he was on a business trip to Prescott, as he had some time to kill and decided to explore the mountains around Jerome. For some reason, he didn't rent a four-wheel drive Jeep as he planned. But the weather was beautiful when he started out, as you can see in the first photo. He made me promise not to leave a comment on the off-road blog (like, Oh, my gosh Matthew, you could have been killed!). I promised.

I got his permission to put this on our blog. And I was the mother who was scared when he was scuba diving with sharks and giant stingrays all over the Caribbean! He sent beautiful underwater pictures from those expeditions.

       

"I found FR413. Unfortunately, two-wheel drive Chevy Trailblazers, serious thunderstorms,  

 6300' elevations, rock slides, and mud do not mix.

When I got almost to the top, I was surrounded by serious storms, 40 mph winds, rain, and more rain. I was screwed. The road had started to wash out and I was losing traction. A three foot boulder came tumbling down, bouncing like a super ball about five yards in front of me as I approached the top of the pass. My rental two-wheel drive was pelted with pea- and golf-ball size rocks.

I will never forget that image of the boulder bouncing down the hill, thinking of the damage that it could have done to me and the rental.

I gassed it as there was no place to turn around and I could see blue skies in the distance. Then I saw this:

No place to turn around. After I backed out of the slot, there was a wall on one side and a 1000'+ drop on the other. And it was steep and muddy and raining cats and dogs.

I had to back out about a half a mile to find a place that I could "barely turn around". I had to inch up to the drop-off and then pull forward to the wall several times until I was pointed back down. I would get out of the truck each time to judge my distance to the drop. I was concerned with getting stuck and the side of the road collapsing sending me over the edge.

Remember the three-foot boulder from my trip up the pass? Now, the road back down (where I had just come from), was completely blocked from the rock slides. I got out of the truck and could hear the rocks still falling around me and it was still raining like no tomorrow.

I was trapped. Nowhere to go, up or down. Rocks falling all around me, on the side of a mountain in a thunderstorm.

I was ready to abandon the truck and call 911 for help. I grabbed my cell phone. No coverage. I was thinking about waiting the storm out (I had enough water and snacks to last a few days), but I was not comfortable with the thought of riding a landslide off the side of the mountain.

I kept thinking about my wonderful kids and wife. And how long it would take for someone to find me.

I got out of the truck and somehow managed to clear a path through the landslide. I would not be surprised if I did not move a rock that weighed at least 300 pounds. It kept rolling and bouncing all the way down. I could not see it hit the bottom because of the clouds, but I could still hear it crashing for what seemed like an eternity.

I made it back down to Jerome and then to Prescott, and I am currently sitting in my hotel room nursing a six-pack.

I am flying home tomorrow and had a route picked out that would take me to Crown King and then down in to Phoenix. I'll stick to the pavement for the rest of this trip.

Somewhere on the mountain. Note the water running next to the wall.

This is a ghost town/old mine on the way up. I would like to have spent some time here.

~ Matthew Rider

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You know what? I'm still not gray. Finally, a few gray hairs sprinkled here and there, but certainly not put there by his antics. Now it's my grandchildren putting the fear in me! 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABY BOY!

WITH LOVE,

MOM

WE ARE ALL MIGRANTS

El Paso, TX

I have posted a previous piece written by my oldest grandchild Cameron Young regarding this trip to the border that briefly told some of their experiences there. A Brighter Future... The following article, written by Cameron, was recently published on the Unitarian Universalist website. UUA Southern Region 

This take on what Cameron calls "borderlanders" brought back dramatic images of my childhood growing up in Texas. From second-graders having DDT put on their hair to rid them of lice, to the 16-year-old Mexican boy who barely fit into our 4th grade desks as he joined us for the couple of months he was able to come when cotton-picking time was finished and his family had not left to return to Mexico. Even as a young child, I felt sorry for the treatment of these children who had no choice as to where they had been born. Today, the immigrant children being held  in confinement at our borders, elicits the same compassion. Hopefully, the actions of people like Cameron will help shine a light on the abuses of our brothers and sisters seeking asylum, and the history of our complicity in some of the unfortunate circumstances that have driven them to seek refuge in our country. The land of the free.

Todos Somos Migrantes: Journeying Toward Collective Salvation 

        

El Paso, TX; the U.S.-Mexico Border; the line between two different worlds which begin to blend the closer in proximity they become. If it were an abstract painting, the U.S. and Mexico would show up on the canvas in radically different colors and textures, yet I imagine the artist would take her hand and smear it at the places the two countries conjoin, leaving the area of Juarez-El Paso particularly indistinguishable, just as the two cities look like only one from a birds eye view. Juarez-El Paso is an environment of effortless pluralism the type that has sparked nationalist hysteria throughout our country, but I view such pluralism as beautiful, perhaps even anthropological art smeared by the hand of God. Border historian Oscar J. Martinez characterizes U.S.-Mexico borderlands as a place with “powerful transnational forces [which] pull large numbers of borderlanders into the orbit of the neighboring country with a resulting array of cross-boundary relationships and lifestyles.”

In January of this year, I made a trip to this part of the border as part of a contextualization study with my peers at Brite Divinity School. It featured a week full of powerful interactions with numerous borderlanders from all walks of life - clergy and activists to academics to refugees - in one moment, I even found myself praying in a federal courthouse as approximately 30 migrants and refugees, many of whom were barely over the age of 18, would be simultaneously sentenced to prison or deportation.

One truly transformative person we encountered was when we visited the Border Farmworkers Center and met its Executive Director, Carlos Marentes. Marentes has oft been compared to his late colleague and mentor, having been called the Cesar Chavez of the West. The U.S. has a long history of abuse and exploitation of migrant farmworkers, from physical abuse, to employers’ failure to pay already minuscule wages. Carlos was quick to give us information chronicling the history of such exploitation, which frequently goes unpublished. He included a picture of workers being sprayed with the pesticide DDT, at the border as part of the Bracero program in the 1950s. Marentes has made it his life’s work to advocate on behalf of migrant farmworkers to prevent such abuses from occurring.

Talking with him was also a powerful reminder of how deeply intertwined our realities are with the workers. For starters - our food. He pulled out a bucket of chili peppers as a physical example of the painstaking and thankless labor that goes into nourishing our bodies. So striking that someone else’s physical pain could manifest in my physical nourishment.

Marentes also provided some insight regarding the causes of such a magnanimous wave of migration. He explained that most agricultural land in Mexico operated under the Ejido system, meaning most of it was community owned - such a foreign concept in our capitalist society. The Ejido system began to decline mid-20th century when the World Bank created dependencies on loans for farming technology, and died with the North American Free Trade Agreement in 1994, championed by then president Bill Clinton. Allowing U.S. corporations to negotiate with Mexico’s financial elite, the U.S. demanded that the Ejido system be abolished from Mexico’s constitution, allowing foreign interests to buy those lands and force its inhabitants to either leave or work for a fraction of the rewards. Think about that - U.S. corporations now have enough power to change a country’s constitution. And it wasn’t just Mexico, comparable trade policies have been enacted elsewhere, devastating thousands of self-sustaining communities across Latin America, because that is what capitalism inherently does.

NAFTA ushered in an unprecedented level of prosperity for much of the U.S. and unprecedented levels of poverty for Mexico. In that, I have to acknowledge the money in my pocket and the food that I eat is tainted. But while this exploitation of citizens might have brought immediate gratification for us, there are long term ramifications for us, too. This caused millions of workers in Mexico to come to the U.S. to seek work, ramping up what is often referred to as the “immigration crisis (yeah - the U.S. caused it).” This ultimately led to a nationalist backlash and Trumpism, which has certainly sent many of us into a frenzy. More so, these policies boosted the Agricultural Industrial Complex in North America, which is now one of the leading contributors of climate change in the world.

Universalism. What happens to one happens to all. The subjugation of laborers across the world that our country has helped cause, has rendered us lost too. Lost in anxiety over our political climate. Lost over the state of our planet. As Universalists, when we say our salvation is wrapped up in others, it is not a theological abstraction - it’s a reality. And when we speak of salvation, it is not of some hypothetical afterlife. It is Here. Now. Just as Juarez and El Paso, despite being on other sides of a fence and belonging to two separate human social constructions we call countries, they are the same from the perspective of our vast universe. With millions of migrants and refugees journeying toward their salvation - their literal saving, it behooves us to journey with them. Because, in the long term, our saving is also contingent upon it.

We are all migrants. Todos Somos Migrantes.

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Cameron Young is a native Texan and lifelong Unitarian Universalist. Having grown up in those programs, they developed a particular affinity for youth and young adult ministry. Prior to joining the UUA, Cameron served as a lifespan religious educator in Fort Worth, Texas for five years, having helped to implement their congregation’s first ever Coming of Age, Spirit Play, and Young Adults programs. Cameron also served a two-year elected position as Young Adult Co-Facilitator at General Assembly. Cameron has a Bachelor of Music from Louisiana State University and is currently a seminarian at Fort Worth’s Brite Divinity School. A professional musician and classically trained singer, Cameron has performed in numerous operas, musicals, is a member and co-founder of DFW’s Uptown Carolers, a professional Christmas caroling company, and also recorded with Grammy award winner Leon Bridges on his debut album. In their spare time, Cameron is an avid traveler, die hard fan of Dallas sports teams, and devoted coffee drinker.

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This grandmother speaks:

After reading this several times, the policies Cameron speaks of that "boosted the Agricultural Industrial Complex" and raised the level of our contribution to climate change, raised my hackles. It brought to mind how dismayed I was to learn that "The U.S. Department of Agriculture's (USDA) 2015 report on foreign investment in U.S. agricultural land found that at least 26.8 million acres of privately held farmland were held by foreign owners, marking a steady increase over the past 30 years."Foreign-Owned U.S. Farmland  What American investors did to Mexico, foreign countries have been doing to us, China being one of the largest contributors. That fact and the increased industrialization of farming exacerbates the plight of farmers as well as those seeking to work for them.

It behooves us to seriously think about what we can do to help the immigrants desperately trying to gain entry into our country. As we are complicit in their reasons for doing so, we must be complicit in - as Cameron puts it, "their salvation". Listening to the solutions the candidates for our next Presidential election put forth, we can at least make efforts to vote for one who puts forth the most logical, compassionate ways to alleviate the "humanitarian crisis" we are facing. We already know that Trump's ways always favor the corporations.

Peace,

Marilyn

Maid of Honor's Speech for the Bride and Groom

Ashlyn & Audrey

"First off, I’d like to say how overjoyed I am that we could all be here to celebrate Erick and Audrey; two people whom I find so deserving of the love they have found in each other. For those of you who don’t know me, (which is not many of you) my name is Ashlyn, the one who has always been fortunate enough to say that Audrey is my sister. There was never a dull moment growing up with Audrey, whether it be a dance performance (on stage or in the living room), making up games for us to play, taking us on nature hikes, or just bringing all of the family together to put on a skit that she orchestrated all on her own. She had a way of making our childhood feel extraordinary. 

For as long as I can remember, Audrey has exuded elegance and confidence. She has always had the strength to stand up for what she believes in, and to unapologetically be herself while inviting others to do the same. She has a love for her family, friends, and this world that is unmatched. There is a difference between what my sister is to me, and what we are as sisters. She has always been my biggest role model, my built-in best friend, and my go-to when I was in trouble with our mom and dad for no good reason at all… (I’m kidding Mom and Dad, I know you had every right), but more importantly as sisters, we have never allowed each other to feel alone. Through every phase of life, no matter how silly or dark the circumstance or how broken we felt, one of us was always there to help pick up the pieces and remind each other that we are always stronger than we feel. I mean, I don’t know anyone who would listen to me cry about my over-plucked eyebrows, or a mountainous pimple on my face for as long as she has.

When I first learned about Erick, I had to admit I was a little leery. I was going to school in Oklahoma at the time, so I wasn’t able to see anything first-hand.. (Audrey) called me and told me about this cute, curly-headed musician that lives in a 'tiny house' that she kept running into at my mom and dad’s apartment. Well, my first thought was 'what in the world is a tiny house, and why is he at the apartments when he has a tiny house?' As fate would have it, hurricane Harvey’s devastating effects had Erick’s parents seeking refuge in the same apartments as our parents. To me, it is evident that the stars were aligned for them to cross each other’s paths. 

As time went on, my sister was just head over heels in love with Erick and his precious son, Ishan. I still had not met him, and I was anxious as all get out to meet the guy that my sister told me 'could be the one'. When I finally had the pleasure of meeting Erick, I knew he was different. It didn’t take long for me to see that he is fun-loving, he can roll with the punches (which is very important in this family), and that he has the adventurous spirit that my sister has always deserved in a husband. More importantly, it was evident from the very first second I saw them together that Erick loves my sister deeply. Not only did I see that he is a

great addition to the family, but so is his son, Ishan, who shares the same adventurous and kind-hearted spirit as his dad. Since Audrey first met Erick, she has radiated a sense of joy, adventure, and love that Audrey has always been capable of, but with more intensity, and a sense of security than I have ever seen in her before. Erick, you are wonderful. I could not imagine a better man for my sister, or to call my brother-in-law. (They don’t know this, but I’ve been working on the blueprints for adding a room in their house for me… but we can cross that bridge when we get there.) 

I only wish I weren’t kidding…Cheers to the stars aligning, and for endless amounts of patience, love and happiness for the both of you! Congratulations Audrey and Erick!"...Ashlyn

Mother Carajean, Bride, Maid of Honor

Audrey & Father Branch

The beautiful wedding of these two took place outdoors at the bride's parents' Lake Travis home on June 1, 2019.

Instead of rice, the guests held fireworks sparklers as the newlyweds made their way to their "getaway car"! A two-week honeymoon was spent in Italy. I can't wait to see the professional photos taken of the wonderful event as well as the ones the couple took in Italy. These were taken by me or son Matthew. 

This was the first of my seven grandchildren to get married. Of course, it was very exciting, and my daughter did a great job of getting her home and backyard ready for the big event. Forty (or more) people for a sit-down dinner was not an easy task to plan, but it was perfect and everything indoors and out was absolutely beautiful. 

As my second oldest granddaughter Ashlyn caught the bridal bouquet, the next wedding may be sooner than we thought. And -- the love of her life is also named Erik! 

This was/is a lot for this aging grandmother to take in. I bubbled with pride at all of my family, but this was one weary woman at the end of a long, beautiful day.

May you all have as much love in your lives,

Marilyn

ADDENDUM:
Just in.. a few photos by ELISA LOPEZ PHOTOGRAPHY:

  

In Memory of a Big Little Man

 John Nance Garner V 

"I am John Nance Garner. I come for a long line of John Nance Garners. My grandfather's brother, John Nance "Cactus Jack" Garner III, was the Vice-President of the United States for two terms under Roosevelt. My father, John Nance Garner lV, was involved in politics, but not in a national capacity. So here I am, John Nance Garner V. I strayed from the political path, and was a disk jockey for thirty years.

"I act at the Denton Community Theater, do art work, and have written my first novel 'Good Bad and Oh My God.'" 

The above short bio John wrote on his Amazon book page, where you can purchase e-books he has written. After his first book in 2012, he went on to write "The Garners: From a beautiful Welsh woman accused of Witchcraft to a heartbeat away from the presidency", "Thank God Elephants Don't Fly", and his last book "Old Billy", his take on Billy the Kid that he finished in 2017.

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I lost a dear friend on May 24th. Although his name was John, those of us who knew him called him "Jack". Jack was one of the first persons I met when I started attending Unity Church of Denton in 1989. He really admired the Unity Licensed Teacher we had at the time, Ellen Davis. She had held her first study group in a motel, which Jack attended along with a few other local folks interested in the Unity beliefs. He remained a member for many years, although Ellen Davis didn't return until she was ordained a Unity minister. The church is now known as Unity Spiritual Center of Denton, located in a nearby suburb of Denton, Texas. Shortly before Jack was admitted to hospice care, he was glad that Ellen would be available to conduct his funeral service, and he outlined plans for his wishes. I cried when he shared that with me on one of our last Saturday telephone visits.

For several years after I left Denton in 2001, Jack and I communicated. In the past few years, Jack has called me every Saturday to catch up on the news and his latest endeavor. Most recently his passion was writing Letters to the Editor of the Denton newspaper, the Record-Chronicle. These were primarily political in nature, many of which I posted on this blog. Next to that passion was his morning breakfast at a local coffee shop, where he met with the same circle of men and discussed politics. These were often loud and confrontational - which Jack really enjoyed.

I remember when in his mid-sixties Jack decided he wanted to "create

Judy Dench

art". He knew that I had done a few pastels, so he asked me to show him some of my techniques (which were very amateurish).

Morning Coffee

He was fascinated, so he then took a few lessons. And oh, what lovely portraits Jack was able to paint. They were larger than life, and accomplished by his viewing photographs - many of which he took on yearly visits to a friend in New Orleans. I have one that I cherish that he copied from a photo of me and my two youngest grandchildren.

Fiddle in the Cold

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I posted the following on my blog almost ten years ago. It tells so much about Jack I want to share it again.

“.. My dear friend, Jack Garner, is 73 this month. Jack has gone through many different 'careers' in his life: DJ, actor, artist, barber, hair stylist, and even a stint as a charismatic 'preacher' (his term). From standing on his feet doing folks' hair for so many years, Jack eagerly 'retired' from that profession. After a while, Social Security notwithstanding, Jack determined he still had years of work ahead of him. He started working as a bus monitor for the Denton Independent School District. He rides twice daily picking up special needs children to deliver them to school and back. In the beginning, there was a grown, young man who is over 6-feet tall with the mind of a three-year-old who rode his bus. His name is Trey. Not knowing what to expect, Jack inquired of the driver how he was to handle this man-child should he begin to agitate or turn violent. He was told to sing the children's song, Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star and that would calm Trey. Jack spent the whole weekend memorizing the words to Twinkle. Twinkle..

Rather than feel the job beneath him, or feel that it was extremely boring, Jack began to fall in love with these special children. With no education or training to do this kind of work, he has presented ideas to his supervisor that have been incorporated into the training program for bus drivers and monitors, as well as others who work with these children. He truly cares what happens to them and doesn't look at them as just people to be shuffled around and given busy work. What wonderful work Jack is doing. If everyone could put as much effort into solving little problems in their world, perhaps we wouldn't have so many big problems. Jack wrote the following:

 THE MAGIC MIRROR "I am trying a new thing with my six children with learning disabilities. One thing learning disabled children have in common is low, low self-esteem. 

I remembered the Louise Hay concept of looking in a mirror and saying I love myself, and how hard it is for many adults to do this. So I introduced the kids to Mr. Jack’s 'magic mirror'. When one of these kids gets on the bus, I get my little hand mirror, lean over the seat in front of them. Then I say (if a boy), 'Look into your handsome eyes in your handsome face and repeat after me: I deeply and completely love and accept myself exactly as I am. Now give yourself a big happy smile'. I've been doing this only two days but have already had some results, well considering the time, I call them outstanding results. 

One little girl with ODD (Oppression Defiant Disorder) usually has a scowl on her face and looks as if she is mad at everybody and everything. I did it with her and when she got off the bus she was still smiling. Marcos, a boy in speech therapy who only learned to speak so he could be understood said 'Hey, this is good'.

I play 'trash can', which is calling out 'trash can' every time we see one, with Andrew, who wants to win so badly (I always let him win except when I need to win to keep him on his toes). Last Friday he asked, 'Who won Mr. Jack?' I told him he did. Then I did the mirror thing with him. Afterwards, as he was getting off the bus, he said, 'Mr. Jack, I don't think I won. I think we tied.' I almost lost my false teeth I was so open-mouthed.

I do this twice a day when they get on and when they get off. I'm hoping it will help them emotionally and I am hoping, hoping, hoping that it will cause them to learn better and quicker. 

You can probably tell I'm very excited about this. I especially wanted to tell you about this because you are familiar with Louise Hay. Wish me and them luck."

(About a week later, JACK wrote the following):

"I am now sure that the magic mirror works. This week the angry little girl with ODD got on the bus, walked up to one little boy and hugged him, then walked back to another little boy and hugged him. Friday when we got to school and I said it was time to go, one of the older children from State School walked over to Trey and said 'Let's go, Trey'. In all the times she has ridden with me she has never done anything like this. She took charge of an issue. I have managed to teach Trey to say 'I love myself' - whether he knows what he's saying or not. I don't know, but I am encouraged. 

I know it helps the children emotionally, now if it only helps them to learn. I do have hopes that it will, but only time will tell. 

Done on a consistent basis, the mirror technique will help any child, not just the ones with learning disabilities. Unless the child is the offspring of the equivalent of saints, negative material will be absorbed by them, and they, in some area, will doubt they are loved. If one doubts they are loved, they will doubt themselves and all that they do. I believe some of this is present in all children and the consistent use of the mirror technique will help them. It is more prevalent in children with learning disabilities, as their intelligence is questioned earlier. I believe the mirror method will help build their self-esteem to the point that they will do better in school. 

Friday my regular driver was out and the Special Needs Assistant drove me and the children. What I didn't know at the time was that he was evaluating both the children and me. He told me at the end of the route he had never been so impressed, and that he was blown away by the improvement in Trey. Needless to say, I was proud as a puffed-up pigeon. I was very proud of the kids."

And I was very proud of you, my good friend!

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As the cancer progressed and I was increasingly aware that I was losing my friend, Jack sensed it and told me more than once that he was not afraid to die, but he was afraid of suffering severe pain. Hospice made certain that he never suffered at the end of his life. God bless them.

Jack's only relative in the Denton area, a nephew, Randy Sherling, is in charge of the funeral arrangements. He advised me that it would probably be another week or so before the service.

In the meantime, Rest in Peace, my friend. I miss you already.

 Marilyn

The "Me" that I came here to be.

Oh, wow! I read those words in my Daily Word booklet and had chills run over me, I had just turned on my "background music", a video on YouTube that is said to unlock your true potential" and to "cleanse self-doubt." I always have musical videos running continually when I am on my computer. Most consist of music containing binaural beats, some of which are Native American flutes and drums; some ringing bowls and soft Om chanting; and many with quiet nature sounds of oceans, rain, and waterfalls. The theory is that binaural beats can help create the frequency needed for your brain to create the same waves commonly experienced during a meditation practice. These can be used for different purposes such as healing, increased awareness, relaxation, learning, etc. I particularly like the ones made by The Power Thoughts Meditation Club and Good Vibes - Binaural Beats. I can attest to the fact that listening to these has alleviated lots of my minor aches and pains. But draw out "the me I came here to be"? The results are still out on that.

1982

I remember reading a book in the 80s titled I Love The Person You Were Meant To Be. It is no longer available on Amazon. Written by Martha Wiley Emmett, it is described as "An intense and extraordinarily realistic account of a married woman's mental breakdown." I don't recall much about the book, but obviously I was going through a depression myself. (A divorce followed not long after.) Those of you who know me well know that I have not been very successful at marriage(s). I read that book because maybe I was looking for an answer as to how I could change and be someone else - and be loved for that someone.

Along came the 90s. Still looking for that "me", I fell victim to the craze of what was known as "glamour shots". Even though I considered myself a feminist, strongly supporting the movement in the 70s, another failed marriage once again led me to believe that my happiness depended upon a man to "love" me. And in order to attract the "perfect" one, I must adhere to the notion of "beauty" that was still prevalent after all the women's movement's work. A couple of days before my 52nd birthday, I trekked to the Glamour Shots studio in our local mall, and when the photographer was finished, (I can't believe I did this), I marched down to the Victoria's Secret shop. "Vanity (frailty, divorce), thy name is woman." That perfect man I thought I attracted? He left me at the altar.

It turns out that was not a bad thing. 30 years later and more than a few counseling sessions, I probably am the "me that was meant to be" - a happy mother of three grown children and grandmother of seven beautiful, bright, talented grandchildren, whose parents are equally precious in my eyes. Each has made me proud. They are better parents than I was, with more stability in their lives than I ever gave to them. It was easy to love all of them - and love them better - once I learned to love myself.

I had many dreams and aspirations that were never realized. Those compared so much to my grandchildren's accomplishments it seems supernatural. They appear to have had some of the same dreams early on. Or their parents dreamed for them. At any rate, I love to brag on them, and I praise them every opportunity I get.

I was never very good at the things I loved to do as a child, but that didn't stop me from trying. No matter where my parents took me or sent me, I quickly found a niche to practice my dreams. Singing, dancing, and acting in school productions, I also played a cello for one brief semester in junior high. When the next school didn't have an orchestra, I played the snare drum. Even in the marching band. The drum weighed almost as much as I did.

I have watched my own children and my grandchildren achieve so much -- and be extremely good at those achievements that it is almost as if I am doing it right along with them. It is so thrilling when they excel at what were once my dreams, I cannot resist lavishing the praise. It's as though the Universe is showing me that dreams do come true... sometimes it takes another generation or two. And great parents - as well as a good education.

I wrote a short play when I was about eleven. A neighbor my age and a gullible young girl about four were helping me to act it out. We ceased acting quickly when the little girl's mother discovered us "acting like we were dentists treating her child"! A couple of years later, I was in the process of writing a Christmas play for the little school in a small town in upstate New York when my mother informed us we were moving back to Texas. I attended four schools in three different states that year.

Two of my grandchildren attended Booker T Washington Performing Arts High School in Dallas. To a child who dreams of such things, it affords a great opportunity to test one's abilities. I can only imagine how excited I would have been to attend such a school. My granddaughter not only acted in several performances, she learned playwriting and directing. My grandson went on to study opera in college. They both have a talent for writing as well. 

No matter where their childhood dreams take them in the future, I have had worlds of fun watching each of them testing their wings and learning to fly! Three have already graduated from college. That was my biggest dream of all.

May all of your dreams come true.. even if it happens through your grandchildren.

Love and peace,
Marilyn