PROMISE FOR OUR FUTURE

In my last post, (Sentimental Me) I told about my grandson, Branch Tanner Archer, and his latest endeavor. As a member of the Sierra Route group of bicycle riders raising money for cancer research, (see Texas 4000), they just completed a 70-day trip of over 6,000 miles in the lower 48 states. They were originally to ride all the way to Alaska but Canada closed its borders before their ride began. Arriving back home in Austin this past Friday, Tanner is now on his way to Alaska (by plane, not bicycle!) to meet up with his parents and other family members. They had made reservations to be in Alaska to greet the riders before Canada closed its borders, and they were unable to cancel their flights for refunds. The family will enjoy this next week with Tanner. Although Mom and Dad were not here to celebrate with him at the ride's conclusion, other family members were:

Papaw, Tanner, Aunt Amy & Cousin Kelly

I haven't yet heard how much money was raised, but the dedication of these young riders is extremely admirable. I want to share what Tanner wrote as his reasons for participation in this grueling fund-raising event:

"My mother survived breast cancer, but I was too young to remember much of what happened. I remember her wigs, and I also remember her lying in bed a lot. My Aunt Elizabeth passed away from colon cancer, but again I was too young to really understand. I finally understood when my Aunt Evelyn, single mother to my cousins Bruce and Annie, passed away from metastasized breast cancer in her spine that we thought she had beaten years ago.

"I'm not sold on free will, but I do think we have choices (and that matters). These women chose something. My mom chose to double the length of her chemo to ensure that it never came back. My aunt chose to laugh at my dad’s jokes that Thanksgiving, just weeks before her death. She chose to fight through ten years of chemo, work full-time as a physician, and raise two children by herself all at once. I have never heard a word of self-pity from either of these women. That’s what they chose, and I want to thank them and their children for their brave choices with my choice to ride."

If you wish to feel optimistic about the future of our country, go to the website for Texas 4000 and read what other young riders wrote about their own reasons for joining in this worthy cause. Many of them are studying for careers in the environmental sciences. You may also choose to donate at this site.

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The strength and courage and determination of these young adults give me much hope for the future of our country and the world. 

Peace and love,

Marilyn

 

SENTIMENTAL ME

“I am at peace with the process of death and grieving. I give myself time and space to go through this natural, normal process of life. I am gentle with myself. I allow myself to work through the grief. I am aware that I can never lose anyone and that I am never lost. In the twinkling of an eye, I will connect with the soul again.” 

As I have written about before, my son Craig made his transition last October. He had lived here with me the year before. When he moved into his own apartment he left behind all of his ties. He no longer dressed in white shirts and ties as he did in previous jobs. If he needed to wear one for some occasion he would just retrieve one from my closet. Many of them I had given to Craig as gifts. His favorites were by Jerry Garcia. I later gave them to my daughter Carajean to keep. Perhaps someone in the family could use them. Carajean surprised me with the small quilted piece above for Mother's Day. She had it professionally made from his ties. 

Craig had a cat named Floki that he was crazy about. The feeling was mutual. Floki has since been adopted by my granddaughter Audrey and her husband Erick. They have all been staying at Carajean's until they move into their new home. Carajean said that when she was working on a pattern for the above and spread the ties out on the floor, Floki immediately came and sat down in the middle of them. He did so again once the quilted piece was finished. He must have smelled his beloved master on them. (I have to admit that being near them on my sofa I feel a strong sense of Craig's presence as well.)

FLOKI

As you can see in the photo below, he is being well taken care of by granddaughter Audrey. To keep Floki safe from predators and traffic she takes him for walks in his very own carrier. 

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Carajean's son Tanner never wastes time. His pursuits are always out of the ordinary. (For instance, he has spent the last couple of years learning Mandarin Chinese. He plans to apply in the future for a year's study in China.) Besides a full load of courses at the University of Texas, he has been a member of the charitable organization Texas 4000 for Cancer for the past year. They have been training on their bicycles for a grueling 70-day trip that began last weekend. Each had to demonstrate they were able to ride 100 miles in 10-hours or less in order to participate in the current Sierra ride. To read about this wonderful organization and perhaps donate, check out their website: TEXAS 4000 Each rider has a personal, moving story about their reasons for raising money to combat cancer.

I got a big kick out of the photo below. This was taken of Tanner on Day 1 of their ride. Ballinger, Texas was where his grandfather and I went to school, met, and married. It's a small West Texas town on their route. The ride originally was to be all the way to Alaska, from which they would fly home. However, due to the pandemic Canada closed their border which instituted many changes in their route. They now are riding in the lower 48 states, returning home on their bicycles. I assume the route will be the same distance mileage-wise. There is a good map on the website.

I couldn't be prouder of this young man. Last year he and a good friend did a "standathon" to raise awareness and money for "Extinction Rebellion", an international nonviolent movement seeking real solutions to climate change. They not only remained standing for 24-hours, being watched online, but they raised over $2,000. Standing for Change

I know Branch Tanner Archer is going to go far in this life and contribute even more to make this grandmother proud!

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It has been difficult to endure the news during the past year and a half without spewing out obscenities on my blogs. Staying home due to the pandemic made it worse, as COVID-19 made it worse. I am now practicing changing my negative thoughts to positive ones before commenting on politics again. Events such as these I have experienced from family make life a lot easier.

Cheer up everyone. There really is light at the end of the tunnel.

Love and peace,

Marilyn

Memories to be Made

I hope everyone is enjoying the Memorial Day weekend. We had horrific storms last night. My daughter Carajean had lots of damage to their Lake Travis home-site. She said the walkway to their boat dock broke, causing the dock to be blown onto the entrance to the community boat ramp. She was waiting for the "boat dock guy" when we last texted. The winds were said to reach 70 mph at times, causing lots of damage all over the area. The only things I noticed here are lots of tree branches in my yard and on my deck. There were many power outages all over Austin and lots of flooded low water crossings remain closed today. Thank goodness our road did not flood this time. In 2018, Lake Travis flooded enough that Mansfield Dam had to have another gate opened. This is what happened to CJ's boat dock that time:

Son Matthew and his wife Amy are playing in a golf tournament today at their club. Apparently wet and soggy greens are not much of a deterrent!  At least the weather today is cooler than the 90 degree heat we've had this past week.

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Erick

The Independence Brewing Company recently held a theme song contest. The winner gets 1,000 bucks, a year supply of Native Texan beer, and studio time!" My grandson-in-law Erick sent me the following video that he and my grandson Tanner made to enter the contest. I was disappointed when they announced the final winner. Erick's video (he wrote the lyrics and music) had previously been chosen Number Four of the top five videos. They then had a "people's choice" vote to decide the winner. I didn't know about it in time to gather votes for theirs. I'm not on Facebook, which is where they

Tanner

announced the runoff. Tanner did a great job of filming and editing. He's done a few remarkable videos since he was around age eleven or twelve. I think that their collaboration on this one shows that they could come up with a "winner" without it being in a contest. Check out their entry:

Erick, a talented musician, is a founding member of the Colombian Funk band Superfonicos. The pandemic has curtailed most of their performances. However, they recently had a gig at The Empire here in Austin. Hopefully, they will be filling their schedule with many appearances as the lessening of the COVID-19 restrictions proliferate and many of Austin's music venues are reopening. Here is their official video, with more to be found on YouTube: Superfonicos - Suelta Makes you want to "shake your booty" and tap your toes, doesn't it?

Peace to all,

Marilyn

FAMILY UPDATE

My son Matthew and his family never seem to run out of fun things to do together. Matthew first loved to play golf as his father did, so it was only natural that he taught his son Travis to play as soon as he was big enough to hold his own golf clubs. Travis just finished his Freshman year on a golf scholarship at Lubbock Christian College. As the two of them spent more and more time together on the golf course or watching tournaments on television, it wasn't long before Matt's wife Amy took up the sport as well. Their daughter Kelly is more into dance and music, although her mother tells me that she is a pretty good golfer, too, when she chooses to play. However, I hear that she is a terrific golf cart driver. Kelly just finished her Freshman year in high school. I see Driver's Ed in her future!

From time to time this past year I kept hearing about Amy's golf experiences. After hearing about her "wins", I decided to ask her about them. You can tell by her responses that she is very excited about the game of golf. Not to mention the fact that there is money to be won! If the teams weren't "computer-generated" I'll bet she would be a popular choice as a team mate! I'm not really up on all the golf terminology, however, there are probably enough golfers reading this who will understand the lingo!   Way to go, Amy!

"I won first place with my team of three players at the weekly Hump Day Hustle, which is a fun social golf league open to all adult Golf Members of the club. It is a three-Person Scramble, ABC Computer-Generated Teams, with a Weekly Powerball drawing following the round. My team also won the Powerball drawing. If no one wins the Powerball that week, the pot keeps building until a team wins. The pot got up to $1,600 and my team won. So I won a total of $663 from my First Place win and the Powerball win.  I am the only female on the three-person team and the men benefit from having me on their team because I get to hit from the Red tees, which sets them up nicely to have a chance at eagle and mostly birdie chances on each hole."

Amy went on to say, "Matthew and I have been playing a great deal of golf since the pandemic started. I have joined the WGA (women's golf association) at River Place CC and have met a lot of new people. I have two great coaches (Matthew and Travis) that have helped improve my game over the past several months. I have played in two women's tournaments thus far. My first tournament ever was The Blind Date Scramble and my team came in First Place. In March, I played in the Shamrock Scramble and we came in Third. Matthew and I have signed up to play in a tournament Memorial Day Weekend. The WGA and MGA are teaming up for their First Annual Charity Golf Tournament. This year's tournament will benefit Meals on Wheels. I am super excited about this event. I just enjoy being in the great outdoors and being with wonderful people, playing a game that I have come to love."

I wish them luck at the tournament this weekend. Affirming clear, blue skies.

Peace,

Marilyn

LOVE IS IN THE AIR

My granddaughter Ashlyn is on her way to becoming a Physician Assistant. Just one more year. She is also a talented writer and speaker as well. Therefore, she has been asked to give speeches when she serves as a Maid-of-Honor at weddings. Even though she was in the middle of finals week when she wrote the following, she did so for her best friend's wedding earlier this month.

ASHLYN

"I’d like to start off by saying how honored I am to be here speaking to all of you the night before my best friend marries the man of her dreams. For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Ashlyn. You can ask anyone and they will pretty much tell you that Shaylee and I have been attached at the hip since the day we met in the 2nd grade 18-years ago. Even when Shay’s dad asked her if she was up for moving to Dallas to train in all-around gymnastics, Shay said 'But, what about Ash?' I have been blamed for that missed opportunity for a while now (sorry Shane), but that is truly the sentiment we have lived by since we met. From then on, I went to lunch with Shay and her family every Sunday at Mimi’s and Granddad's after church, and she went on all of our family trips and always had a spot at our table for Thanksgiving or Christmas. We really became sisters, and I can honestly say she is one of my favorite people on this Earth. Even when she frustrates me to the point where I could pull my hair out, she is pretty high up there on my list (I say this in a joking tone). Yes, because she is my best friend and second sister and all of that cliché stuff, but also because Shay is just one of those people that is almost impossible to be mad at. No matter how angry, upset, or frustrated I am about a situation, Shaylee will make me laugh.

"If I could sum Shaylee up in one word it would be JOY, because that is the feeling that people have when she is around. Over the years, I have to admit I became protective of Shay because there was a time when life was stealing her joy. She was having a difficult time deciding what to do with her life after 14 or so years of fully devoting herself to gymnastics, which was understandably so. While she still managed to make everyone around her feel joy, I could see she was draining herself of her own. The dynamic of our friendship at that time from the outside looking in, and from Shaylee’s perspective, has been Shay looking to me for life advice of any kind (as if I actually know what I am talking about), while Shaylee has always made sure we were having a good time. Well, what Shay and a lot of people do not know, is that I have looked up to Shay my whole life. She leads by example in many ways that she does not realize. Shay loves deeply and will do anything for her family or a friend, she lifts people up and reminds us to not take life too seriously, she has an empathy for people that I strive for, and not only does she manage to make everything fun, but she also brings out the carefree and fun side of everyone she is with.

This is one of the videos on YouTube showing Shaylee's talent:

"When Shay met William last year, I was no longer living in Amarillo and Shay was working at the Amarillo club. She would call me excited about this cute guy who would often come in for lunch or dinner and inevitably flirt with her every time. She would go on about how confident and sweet he was, and that he seemed like an actual 'good guy' that had pure intentions. I have to say, this is something I took with a grain of salt because I pretty much didn’t trust any guy with Shaylee since that is the protective friend that I am (nothing against you William). They go on a couple of dates (or trips I should say) and Shay is very obviously infatuated with him. She hints to me that it is getting serious, so I think I have to meet him as soon as possible before she really falls for him. Well, when I finally met William and saw them together as a couple, it hit me how good he was for her. It was made clear that he loves her and truly sees the Shaylee that I know and love so much. He appreciates what makes her so special. I then started to realize Shay wasn’t calling me as much needing help or advice on anything, she was no longer drained of her joy, and gained back that passion for life that I had not seen in a couple of years. As a best friend, how could I be mad about that?

SHAYLEE

"Shay and I made a pact a long time ago that if we weren’t  married by age 50 or so, that we would get married (to each other?). Well, William. You beat me to it. I guess I will let you have her on the weekends. I’m only kidding, I find great comfort in knowing she is in good hands with you, William. Cheers to the future Wares! I could not be happier for the both of you."...Ashlyn

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Ashlyn always makes a beautiful Maid of Honor. I can only imagine what a wonderful bride she will be. She's smart, beautiful, and has a great sense of humor. It will be interesting to hear what someone says in a speech at her wedding! 

I am finally rising up from the grief our family has suffered since last fall when my oldest child, Craig, left us unexpectedly in his sleep. Our family is valiantly moving on. Siblings, cousins, and his own children are putting their lives back in order. A memorial to this loving man will be held on the anniversary of his passing in October. 

There have been many happy as well as sad occurrences in recent months. I intend to do my best to document some of them in the near future. 

Leaving you with this adorable photo. The one on the left was Craig's pet, named Floki. He was adopted by my granddaughter Audrey. Olive on the right is Ashlyn's treasured cat. They all are currently "visiting" at my daughter's home on Lake Travis. I'm told they sometimes have a raucous play time.  

Peace and love,

Marilyn

"Don't Just Do Something, Sit There"

That's mostly what I've been doing the past year. Sometimes I wish it had never happened. So many painful events both personal and national occurred. The worst of which was the loss of my oldest child, Craig, on October 24th. We have been unable to complete our mourning period by holding a memorial due to the pandemic.

It has been a full year since I have left my little cottage here in Austin. In January, 2020 my daughter Carajean took me to my primary care physician for an annual checkup. Next we went to the hair stylist I've used for several years for a much-needed haircut. He cut thirteen inches off of my hair, which turned out to be a real blessing. At the time we had no idea I would be unable to return for over a year. Of course, by now those thirteen inches have grown back plus inches more. As a result of the events of the past year I now have some gray hairs sprinkled among the new growth. And I am still unable to leave my cozy home.

(Grandchild Cameron on one end of Porch) 

The COVID-19 pandemic keeps looming unrelentingly over us, worsening every week. Because of this, my children Carajean and Matthew are almost paranoid over the possibility I might be exposed to the virus. My cottage has a large front porch that is conducive to holding "porch visits" while maintaining social distancing. During these visits everyone wears their mask unless they are eating or drinking. Everyone but me. My oxygen tubing makes it too difficult. If anyone needs to be indoors (Matthew is my go-to for minor tasks and "fix its"; Carajean changes my sheets), I am instructed to remain on the porch. Ordering groceries and medications online has made shopping possible during this pandemic. As I no longer own a car, I can easily have them delivered or picked up curbside. Again, my children or grandchildren come to the rescue.

It appears I may have to wait longer for my much-needed haircut. I really don't mind, but I look forward to being able to visit at someone's place besides my own! Or having company indoors again. The weather reports become critical in planning porch visits. Thank goodness the Hill Country has had a fairly mild winter so far. Playing dominoes or Qwirkle in 60- and 70- degree weather is not so bad.  Remarkably, the reports say we will have record-breaking 85 degrees this afternoon.

Modern technology has been a huge blessing (and even a curse at times). No matter that we might be confined to home, there are always texts, emails, and entertainment at our fingertips. We may have cowered in fear at some of the news that reached us day and night. As we anxiously awaited election news, we were bombarded with conspiracies and threats from the opposing sides. Then there were the constant instances of the votes being threatened in state after state by a president who refused to believe he would not be around another four years!  We held our breath as votes were counted and then recounted.

Whew.. At last we had a new President elected - or thought we did. Then January 6th happened. The repercussions of the assault on our nation's Capitol continue to this day. Many of the participants are being arrested and charged. And finally, the instigator of the horrific events of that day will be judged by a jury of his peers. Our former president probably won't be convicted at his impeachment due to his loyal followers who fear for their futures if they vote to convict. The world knows he is guilty. In the meantime, President Biden is making progress in undoing so much damage that was done to our democracy by the previous administration. Way to go, Joe!

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On a lighter note. The bright spots in a dark year were staying in touch with friends. I love hearing news regarding their families. One dear friend in Denton has a daughter, Donna Rodgers, who is amazing in her talents. Her mother recently shared a photo of her daughter's most recent accomplishments.  From time to time, I had checked her homemaking blog. www.cominhome.net Besides homeschooling her five children, Donna is an accomplished seamstress, musician, songwriter, and since about 2016-2017, she began to use the sculpting tools left to her by her late father. These are just a couple of examples. More can be seen on her website www.classicalsculpting.com.

This is titled after the Greek mythological character Arethusa, Nymph of Achaia. Donna's daughter Rebekah was the model. She uses members of her family as well as friends as models. 

She used her youngest son Christian, who was on his way to boot camp, to model Lucifer's angry rage at his defeat in Paradise Lost. Donna said that he made the angriest face she'd ever seen! 

Donna's websites share her remarkable life and interests. She even tried her hand at beekeeping. You can find out more and see her sculptures from her Instagram site:  @donnacrodgers.. or her blog at https://donnacrodgers.com/blog/.  She is one busy lady -- working a full-time job as well as all of her artistic endeavors.

Makes me feel more than a little bit lazy!.. But then, I remind myself of the title of this post, and I am going to go into the living room and "sit there".

Peace,

Marilyn

THE WAVES STILL COME

 My daughter Carajean had the sad experience of finding her brother Craig had passed away in his sleep on October 24th. The experience will remain with her always. She has been a constant source of comfort to me since that time. The precious meme below of brother and sister was sent to her by Craig. The moving article on grief was sent to her by her son Tanner shortly after Craig's death. It so aptly describes my own experiences the past three weeks that I feel the author reached inside my soul and captured my feelings.

"Alright, here goes. I’m old. What that means is that I’ve survived (so far) and a lot of people I’ve known and loved did not. I’ve lost friends, best friends, acquaintances, co-workers, grandparents, mom relatives, teachers, mentors, students, neighbors, and a host of other folks. I have no children, and I can’t imagine the pain it must be to lose a child. But here’s my two cents.

"I wish I could say you get used to people dying. I never did. I don’t want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don’t want it to 'not matter'. I don’t want it to be something that just passes. My scars are a testament to the love and the relationship that I had for and with that person. And if the scar is deep, so was the love. So be it. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are a testament that I can love deeply and live deeply and be cut, or even gouged, and that I can heal and continue to live and continue to love. And the scar tissue is stronger than the original flesh ever was. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are only ugly to people who can’t see.

"As for grief, you’ll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you’re drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it’s some physical thing. Maybe it’s a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it’s a person who is also floating. For a while all you can do is float. Stay alive.

"In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you’ll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart.  When they come,  they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what's going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything...and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.

"Somewhere down the line, and it's different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O'Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you'll come out.

"Take it from an old guy. The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don't really want them to. But you learn that you'll survive them. And other waves will come. And you'll survive them, too. If you're lucky, you'll have lots of scars from lots of loves. And lots of shipwrecks." G. Snow

RANDALL CRAIG YOUNG

Craig's obituary:

Craig Young Obituary

Craig's memorial service will be held November 28th at 1 pm at Weed-Corley-Fish Funeral Home on North Lamar, Austin, Texas. The service will be live streamed on their Facebook website: 

WCFFunerals

I have received so many beautiful condolences, cards, and floral arrangements from you, my friends and loved ones. If I haven't already, I will thank you individually very soon. It's your love and prayers that have kept me going. I am so blessed in having you all in my life.

The waves are still coming..

Peace and Love, 

Marilyn